Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Why The Stalker Isn't Allowed In Public

Hi ho everyone! It's ye olde Slacker Stalker apologizing for missing the past week. And a day. Let's not get picky. Usually I take a few minutes in the morning, load my photos and then blog on a break at work. Well the past week has held no breaks for me and home life has all been about presents, wrapping, cooking, baking, feeding dogs, working and getting ready for the Nutcracker in Houston.
Yes, the camera was found and photos were taken. It's difficult to take photos of yourself in a dress, so I had to hand the camera over to someone else and I think they were drunk. Ok, I really can't complain. The few I took look as if I was drunk too. But I had reason. Really.

The plan for Saturday was:

7 am. Crawl my sleepy arse out of bed. Enjoy coffee, time with the hubby, time with the puppies, a nice long shower with leg shaving involved and then get dressed for the drive.

9:30 am. Head out the door and to the salon to have my hair done. Nothing major, just curls down my back. Ok, tamer curls than I usually have. Enjoy being spoiled.

10:30 - 11 am. Drive to Houston.

Noon. Arrive in Houston. Make gingerbread house with the family I went with. Get ready with plenty of time to spare.

4:30 pm. Head for dinner looking glamorous and woo every man in sight with my beauty.

6:30 pm. Head for Wortham Theatre and woo every man in sight with my beauty. Enjoy Nutcracker. Head home.

This is NOT how my day went. Don't get me wrong, I had a fabulous evening and got to spend some fun time with some very good (if decidedly odd) friends. MY day went a little more along these lines:

7 am. Roll over, shut off screaming alarm and go back to sleep.

9:30 am. Drag my tired arse out of bed. (Did I ever mention how little willpower I have against my bed once I am in it? My willpower is miniscule.) Get coffee and think of how much I actually need to do before I can leave.

10:30 am. Hope in shower for the world's fastest shower by a female ever. Pack clothes for the evening. Find makeup. Pack makeup. Find camera. Pack camera. Grab dress, shoes and cape from the spare bedroom and lay them on the sofa for transport to the car. Shoo dogs away from dress they so desperately need to lay on. Pack everything into the car.

12 pm. Head for the salon to get my hair done.

12:05 pm. Head home to grab Christmas gifts sitting in living room for the family I am heading towards.

12:15 pm. Head for the salon to get my hair done.

1:30 pm. Head for Houston.

1:31 pm. Stop for gas because I only have a quarter tank.

2:45 pm. Arrive at friends house. Sit and chat while everyone takes showers since they are running a bit behind as well.

4:00 pm. Realize everyone else is running around getting dressed and I am still in jogging pants and house shoes. Get make up on and get dressed.

4:45 pm. Head for Dinner at La Strada in Houston. Mmmmmm....tasty. Realize the waiter is flirting with me by leaning over me to get to friend's glass to refill it and by getting an eyefull of boobage as he does so. Begin glaring at the waiter. Waiter brushes AGAINST ME as he reaches over for friends water. Tell friends if waiter boy does it again, nice restaurant or not, I am stabbing him in the groin.

6:30 pm. Head for the Nutcracker. Stand around looking nice (No, not glamorous but we did our best.) and while turning to head for the auditorium, break heel of left shoe. Walk a smidge funny trying to favor left leg due to broken heel. Realize our nice box seats are 3 flights of very narrow steep stairs down. Take shoes off entirely to keep from breaking neck. Enjoy ballet.

Afterwards we ran around (Me without my shoes. In Public. My mother is getting chills right now for no reason she knows of.) and took pictures like drunken tourists. This first blurry shot is the humongo wreath they had in the atrium.

Next we have a shot of the lovely Christmas tree they had out.

Here's a shot of all of us, post ballet, in front of the lovely Christmas tree. From the left, it's Pam, myself, Beth behind me in red, Jessica and Von, Pam's hubby, looking like Cousin Guido. We teased the poor guy all night.

Next is the big ass gingerbread house they had there. It's made with little gingerbread man cookies. It was pretty awesome.

After running around the Wortham sans shoes, we headed off to Katz's for dessert. Yes, there is a famous Katz's in New York. This one was started by his son. Then it was back to their place for gift exchanges, of which I have no photos because I am a dunder head.

Next is photo of me, out of costume of any sort, hair off my neck and back (that shit gets hot people, let me tell ya.) Exhausted to the point of giddiness.

I then gathered my things, old and new, and headed home. I obviously made it fine. Despite the shoe breaking, the steep narrow stairs my legs are STILL recovering from and being so far from being on time for anything that day, it was a very lovely time.

Update: Yes, I had an absolute blast! As far as the cape, you'd think I'd be afraid to take it off. People kept trying to take it from me. Alas, no pictures of the cape. If I have to I will have a picture taken of just the cape. I'm thinking of just wearing it for winter over a jacket. It's really warm. And Norma Dear, I swear on all things wooly, the shoe really broke. I need to take a picture of it. lol


Christina said...

So did you at least have fun?

Imbrium said...

Something about "the best laid plans...."

I can't be on time for anything. I was born two weeks late, and I haven't caught up yet. Now I'm dating aboy with the same disability...we can't get anywhere on time. We try to pretend it makes us charming, but I don't think we're fooling anybody.

At least you had a good time, and you looked lovely (from what I can tell, squinting at the blurry picture), but where's the cape?

Norma said...

Yes, where's the cape? And you BROKE YOUR SHOE? That's the oldest story in the book, m'dear stalker!!! Really, tell the truth: You had a blast, didn't ya?