You Harlot!

I. Met. The. Yarn. Harlot. I did. I so did. I stalked her and everything. So let me tell ya the story.

I spent Friday night at mom's cuz she's closer to Austin and she had thought she might be able to go and she had my first 2 Harlot books from reading them and such. Then she and I got to talking on Friday night and the next thing I knew, it was 7 am and I had to hop in the shower to leave her house by 8 and be in Austin on time. That's right folks. No sleep. I didn't care. There was stalking to be done.

So off I head to Austin, cane in hand, worried that when I get to meet her I am going to totally dork out. I probably did, but I have an excuse. Ha! Anyway, I wasn't worried about falling asleep because I love the drive to Austin, where the motto is "Keep Austin Weird," so there's always something entertaining on they way. Like this little gem. Female biker. Love the license plate.

Rocket Bunny, indeed. Yes, we were stopped at a red light. Jeez, people. Do you think I take pictures while driving?? Ok, yeah so I took this one (and literally 8 more just like it) on the way.

This is why I could never fall asleep on this drive. It's gorgeous. It's like going through tree tunnels...and I think we all know how I feel about trees, huh. So, gorgeous drive, blah blah, motorcycle babes, blah blah. I found the church where she was speaking (does anyone else find this slightly ironic? Yes? No? ok) with no problem what so ever and man....was there a crowd! Here's the early crowd from my vantage point..


And that's just from 2 angles. I didn't get what was behind me. She had a nice turn out! I must say, it was a bit creepy to find people in the crowd knew who I was. If you guys papparazzi'd me, let me know would ya? I wanna come see how bad the pics turned out. To top off the heat of the day (Steph agreed with me that it was damn hot) my face broke out like 2 days before from my hip meds and I swear I had 15 yr old boys stopping me on the street giving me Clearasil money. It was sad.

So anyway, Steph was introduced as "Just another Harlot on South Congress" and we all laughed, but Steph? You're not just any Harlot, k? And here she is! Blogging us!

I know everyone says it, and it always comes across as sucking up to Steph or just, I don't know, insincere, but dudes, she's awesome. No, I am not gonna fall at her feet and worship her (unless my hip gives out and she calls 911 for me) and I know she's not perfect, but she is quite something. She's funny as hell. She had us rolling with tears in our eyes. Or it might have been lack of sleep. I don't know. I do know I watched her while I was in line after the reading and over at Hill Country Weavers and she treated each person individually with care and spent time with everyone. She viewed and commented on projects, asked about blogs....she is a lot more patient than me. Just another way we are polar opposites. She is also, quite lovely. Proof!

Before I got up to meet here, there was another lady in line who's name was Angie. Steph asked her if she was Stalker Angie. She was not. So I worked up nerve and went with the dorky and yelled "Steph!" She looked at me and I told her that I was, in fact Stalker Angie and I got the same response as Skitter; "Wow, you're a real person!" This cracks me up. It must be pretty awesome to travel the country and meet all these people. So then I got up there and I am so impressed that I didn't go total fan girl on her and just start screaming. Point for me. But I did get a Harlot hug, and we talked, we laughed, we blogged....


I totally dorked out when I got to hold the sock.


The lady behind me in the red skirt does NOT look amused. I'm sorry I took too long. Really. I know how bad the heat was. I promise. I know how hard the line was too. Thank you for not beating me with your circulars.


We discussed how now that we are face to face, polar opposites getting along, it was a bit disappointing because I think we both expected world peace to descend. I fully expected the middle east to suddenly sit down, pull out yarn and needles and discuss gauge and swatches. Someone in line said they would check the news when they got home. I like that person.

I didn't want to leave. I wanted to steal the stool next to her and just chill with her while she made nice with everyone. Or maybe I just wanted to sit and get off the gimpy hip. We may never know. I would, however, seriously love to spend an afternoon of tea/wine/beer and knitting with her. I think it would be a total hoot.

So I ended my Harlot adventure, stepped outside and stalked.




I uhh...don't know who these people are. By then I didn't know who I was. If you're in the picture, tell me! Hee!

I also got to meet Very Pink (very briefly, she liked my shirt) who is in one of these photos I believe. It was all a whirlwind but it was all wonderful.

Growth

I have been avoiding the back part of my yard. Oh, I go outside and play with Bonnie and Clyde, or to BBQ or such, but I avoid the back part of it. The reason being that the back part of my yard used to contain a pear tree that was reduced to this during the fence construction.

This still bothers me. I cried for a week when my dad cut down a silver maple because it threatened his precious swimming pool. Now, I know pools are expensive, but damn, could you look into how extensive the root system is before you plant it? Cuz, it would have been easier. I know I've said it before, but I have a thing for trees.

I like the sound of the ocean but I hate the beach. I like the look of mountains but I don't want to climb them. Deserts have a sparse beauty to them but I don't really wanna visit them. Wide, open plains have a grace about them with their tall blowing grasses and their breath taking open skies but I feel too exposed. Trees I have love for.

Give me a forest with tall, majestic trees reaching to the sky. Give me the sound of the wind blowing through them as their leaves rustle with the movements of the earth. Give me the steady drip of trees after a rain storm. Trees provide food, shelter, shade and oxygen. They are a place to rest, a place to play and a place to live. In the Spring they fill the air with new growth and the flowers of the fruiting trees. In the heat of Summer, they give us shade from the sun and rustle to let us a know a cooling breeze is headed for us. In the Fall, they give us beauty in the final blazes of color transformations before the leaves fall. In the Winter, they provide a stark, skeletal beauty against the gray Winter skies.

Imagine my delight when I stepped out in my backyard and actually walked back to the back fence to see this.
That, my dear friends, is a baby pear tree. It's coming up from the root system and I cannot tell you the amount of whooping and hollering that went on in my backyard. So to the fence builders who cut it down I say, "Take that, you troglodyte chattel!! Viva la Poire!" And in less fancy English/French combo, "Ha! Kiss my ass, tree killers!!" To the pear tree, I say, "Grow, baby, grow. You got a few months to get big enough to survive the Winter. I'll do what I can for ya."

In knitting news (yes, it says knitting. I do know how, ya know.), this baby continues to grow.

This is made of the Touch Me yarn I got on my Dallas trip. I...I don't know what it's going to be. I really don't. I'm not sure I care either. I'm not worried about the end result. I am just enjoying working with this yarn. It will either be a wide scarf, a short stole or a big square to roll nekkid on. Like I said, this is all about the working with this yarn. I can also work it without my hands hurting and that's been wonderful. This project is also about re-teaching myself to knit. Seems I hold the yarn continental and wrap the yarn wrong so all my stitches are twisted. I re-learning how to yarn over so I don't get twisty stitches. It's a slow process, let me tell ya.

Tomorrow I am driving to Dallas Austin (Sorry, I miss my Dallas Grrls.)to meet Stephanie, the Yarn Harlot. Guys, I get to stalk her in person. I should like, wear a mask and stuff except that would be beyond creepy for her and this is Texas. The headlines would read "Stalker Suffocates In Superwash!" or something equally stupid. Too hot. Plus, I am so looking forward to meeting my dear polar opposite. Hee!!

See you guys Monday when I come down off my Harlot high.

Additions

Look! It's the promised post from 2 of the previous posts! With pictures! And lots of exclamations!

This is a long, picture heavy post, my dear Stalkees, so bear with me while it all loads up. It's been a hectic couple of weeks at Casa de la Stalker with plenty to blog and it's not all about deflecting shit from Lee Ann during her recovery. Who, by the way, looks awesome and has a new weapon in the clearance section of her LYS. Sweetheart, if they try to take the yarn you were ogling, whip off the awesome skull durag and tell them the scar is from the last fight you had over yarn and that you were the winner of that one. Then grin at them. Then email me so I can laugh and laugh. It'll be so awesome.

Anyway, back to me, yay. So like I said, it's been hectic. There was the fence building and so forth and there has been just lots of throwing shit away from my house. We have set so much crap out on the road only to check an hour later and it is mysteriously gone. This has been so entertaining we are searching the house for crap to throw out. We have a big TV console and TV in my yarn room that is going to go and we can't wait for the console to try and leave. We're going to stake out the front windows to watch on that one. Yes, we have been getting rid of crap so why is this post titled additions? Meet Bonnie and Clyde.
Bonnie is the tan and Clyde has the cream coloring. T found these poor guys on the Catahoula Rescue Message Board and asked me what I thought. What do I think about what? Who remembers Penny, the Demon Dog? We are still recovering in our house from Penny. No. No way am I bringing in TWO Catahoulas when one did so much damage. Nope. Huh uh. Then he says this to me:

"They were dumped by their previous owners who had obviously abused them and they were found on the Utah freeway system starving to death. They are in a high kill shelter and if they don't have someone claim them today, they'll be euthanized in 24 hours."

Well, shit.

So, I made the stipulations that these were HIS dogs, he takes care of them, they are never allowed inside my house, they do not mingle with the little ones at all, and I want nothing to do with them except to be allowed in my backyard. Clear enough? I think so. I hold some serious bitterness towards poor Penny. Anywho, the rescue network had a guy picking up dogs in Colorado to come this way, so he agreed (free of charge) to hop on up to Utah and grab these 2. Then he called us halfway to Texas and raved about what wonderful dogs they were. Yeah right, dude. Tell someone who will believe you.
Then they got to the Dallas region and was fostered for 2 days with the lady who watched them after their spaying and neutering, who called us and told us how wonderful they are and how her 2 year old rides Clyde around like a horse. Whatever lady. You are so not gonna convince me that any Catahoula is "wonderful." Then hubby went up to Hillsboro, Texas and got them. When I got home from work that day I knew I had to go meet them and face them and deal with them being in my backyard. Ugh. Hubby had already called me a told me they were shy, skiddish and a bit stand-offish due to previous abuse. Great. I get to deal with mental dogs.

I get home, play with the little ones for a while and T comes in to lead me out back to meet the new dogs, warning me that they may not come to me at first. So I step outside, sit in one of the deck chairs and say "Hi, Bonnie and Clyde. Welcome home." They both came up to me, sniffed me, wagged their tails and laid their heads in my lap. It still brings tears to my eyes. I love these dogs. We've had some work and there's still a lot left to do but they have come so far. They are always happy to see us, they no longer cringe if we move too fast and they are beginning to finally play after almost 3 weeks. When we first got them, if you threw a toy they tucked tail and ran the opposite direction. Neither of these dogs is over 3 years old and they don't know how to play.

They are protective of us and our home. They can both jump our new 6 foot fence, but they just go to the front yard, lay down in the grass, then go BACK into the back yard of their own accord. If we let them go in the front with us, they stay with us and could care less about any cars or people going by unless someone steps in the yard, then they growl unless we say it's ok. These guys are smart and really amazing. They are pranksters. They love to ride and at one point T had popped his trunk for something and they both hopped in the trunk ready to go. They were a booger bear to get back out. The only time we have lost control of them was when our neighbor across the street came home and lowered his tailgate to unload something out of his truck. Before we know what was happening, they were across the street and in the guys truck bed. They REALLY like to go for rides. When I hurt my hip and was laid up on the couch, Clyde kept jumping the fence to lay on the porch below the window behind the couch. It was the weirdest thing. I cannot tell you how happy I am with these 2. I still can't believe we get to keep them. We still don't let them mingle with the little ones. We're gonna keep it that way.

Also new to our home, is these little guys. Mama Wren has hatched 2 more eggs in her laundry room nest. Two yellow beaks and twice the chirping power.

Speaking of additions, I had another new addition come live with me courtesy of Erin. Meet Clucky Rooster*. Clucky came with not only the cutest card ever, but she came bearing gifts of Lorna's Laces. I now own 4 skeins in 2 colorways of this wonderful crack yarn and I still don't knit socks. What is wrong with me??

A close-up of Clucky herself.
And because it's all about the yarny goodness, a close up of the Laces.
T had a hard time figuring out why I was dancing (ok, hobbling and limping) around with a box yelling "My chicken came in, my chicken came in! Woohoo!" until I opened the box and got teary eyed and said "My chicken brought me sock yarn! *sniffle* How cool is that!?" Which is when he realized it had to do with blogger things and gave up. Thank you soooo much, Erin. She's perfect.

I leave you with the sentiment at my house of all the recent activity. I think Alex sums it up beautifully.
*For those that are my age and wondering why the name of the chicken sounds almost familiar, she was named after Punky Brewtser. Hee!

And The Wuss Of The Year Award Goes To......

Me! Yay!!!!

I am a self professed wuss child. I don't like pain. I can handle a shot or when they draw blood. I can handle tattoos. I can handle a papercut ok. Dislocate my hip, get an ear infection, mess with my teeth or menstrual cramps and I turn into this whining ball of cosmically pathetic "Why me make it stop waaaah" . As we know from the last post from whenever ago, I dislocated my hip. For those of you who think you're funny, no, T does not need to be "more gentle". Perverts. Hee! Here's the story....

When I was 16 and in ever so much better condition than I am now, I was running track one day and I must have landed wrong because my right hip just dumped me on the track. I rolled over and sat up, looked down, and my right knee and foot were facing in. They aren't supposed to do that ya know. I completely popped that ball joint out of the socket. Fun stuff that. Fast forward....a few years.....and last Sunday I was helping T put a window unit A/C into our front bedroom/my yarn room. He was outside holding the accordion shutters so I could screw them into the window sill (so yeah, technically, I guess there actually was screwing involved). We have short windows so I had to kneel down. Anyone remember last year when I screwed up my left knee bowling? Ok, so we didn't want to put the pressure on that knee so we knelt on the right leg. I feel this weird popping sensation....aaaand ignore it cuz I'm stupid.

Fast forward, Monday morning. Wake up. Sit up. Stand up. Fall down. Pretty normal until that last part. I'm really not much for falling as a morning routine. Not being able to function before coffee, as we have previously discussed, I think to my self, "Damn, I am really groggy today." I get up off the floor, stumble in for my morning ritual, start coffee, pet the doggies, bend over slightly to wash my hands at the kitchen sink and down I go again. It's at this pivotal moment that the hip has decided it is really, very seriously dislocated and the pain sets in as I hit the floor. At this point there was much screaming, crying, drooling and writhing on the floor. T was looking up the number to the nearest Catholic church as he was asking me what was wrong. I'm sure I looked possessed. He gets brownie points for multi-tasking.

I stayed home Mon and Tues, I guess expecting the hip to go home when it got bored? I don't know. I'm stupid and I hate doctors. Again, it's been discussed before. I went to the doctor on Wednesday and he said "Surgery." I said, "Oh hell no. Just pop that bitch back in place like they did before. We're not doing this 'surgery' thing. No." So he rolled his eyes at me (doctors do that a lot for some reason when I go) and he and his little Marquis de Sade cronies went to work on the hip and snapped it back in. Let me tell ya, those little bastards move fast when a patient come up screaming and swinging. I never connected once. So after laying there sobbing and calling my doctor some very creative things (I may have even borrowed some of NanC's driving terms) and him looking at me like I was stupid (cuz he was all "she asked for it"...jerk) I got to go home.

So my hip is in, right? We're good, right? Sure it hurts like hell, but that will pass, right? Right. Thursday, I go to work. Stuuuuupid. There is much writhing in the chair and whining and tears and pain. Friday morning we go back to the doctor and there is hip and knee twisting and tests and x-rays and more tests and pain. Newest diagnosis? Bursitis. I cannot tell you how pleased I am to have a hip condition that is going to take for freaking ever to heal. Not only is there pain, but burning. My hip is on fire. This is not right. This is not normal. This requires extra special whining and crying on my part. On the plus side, I'm on a cane. I get to whack people in the shins and call them "sonny" and nobody, but nobody, fucks with me in the clearance aisle.

Taking in the bad mojo

Miss me? Yeah, I've been laid up since Sunday with a dislocated hip. Yay! I am totally taking my cosmic lumps for Lee Ann's recovery. From reading around the interweb here, she should like, not only recover from her surgery, she should have perky breasts and tight abs, huge amounts of energy and never catch another cold as long as she lives. Here's to ya, sweetie. I'll take the gimpy hip so long as you're okay. :)

Real post tomorrow. With pictures. Ya know, the one I promised for Monday? Yeah, that one. Hee

Knock Knock...

Who's there?
Dwain
Dwain who
Dwain the bathtub, I'm dwowning.

Yeah bad joke. I know. No real post today, I'm afraid. I am drowning in stupidity at work and callers who think I have a magic "fix-it" wand shoved up my butt. For the record? I don't.

Real post on Monday with pictures and everything. We have 2 new additions to the family I have to show off and there might be yarn content. Ya never know around here.

See ya Monday and have an awesome weekend!

PMS + Bad Hair Day = Drastic Hair Measures & Weeping

First off, let me just say to those who may be concerned, my uterus is still where it belongs. I believe that particular crisis is over. For now. I make no promises to what may happen in a few weeks from now.

Pacalaga - I think I am the only female on the planet that wants nothing to do with chocolate during "that time." It tastes gross to me then. Any other time, bring it on.

P-la - You sure know the way to a girl's heart. :)

Norma - Thank you for making me laugh hard enough to make the hubby ask me if I was ok. Totally batshit indeed, Madam.

Chris - He knows who Ryan is cuz he's heard the name for over 2 years now and she's the one what got the Stalker Angie gig started. He's still worried I am gonna run off with her.

Ms. Ryan - You rule. You truly do.


Now, who remembers this picture?


Bad yellow lighting, bad blonde streaks, hair whacked off, and still looking too dry for it's own good. This was right after I got 7 or 8 inches of my hair cut off. And here a back side view of same haircut with less yellow lighting and a better idea of my blonde streaks.

Well, I got tired of the blonde and the tangles it caused. I got tired of the length again. I had PMS. Friday I had it all whacked off again. I didn't blog it on Monday because I was still crying. Looking at it now, it looks so much healthier and it's really pretty. All I could see over the weekend is it didn't look like I got a haircut. It looked like I dyed my hair 2 shades too dark. Yes, there's still some of the color left on some of the tips because my hair grows stupid and I didn't want it too short. Still looks cool. Hehe

Behold. The Stalker's natural color that has not been seen in over 2 years.

Now compare the 2 back views. Yeah. Its a big change.

There's shine there now. There wasn't before. There's healthy hair where there wasn't before. The color isn't bad, just not used to it. I guess I'm done crying about my hair. I'll just blame it on the PMS.

A Conversation Had Not 5 Minutes Ago.

Not much to post today because I am being very girly and bloaty and crampy and dear sweet baby Jesus on a pogo stick, very, very bleedy. T made the mistake of coming over to my desk at work. In case you didn't know, we work for the same company in different departments.

Me:Hi baby, will you rip my uterus out?

T: Uh, no?

Me: Now.

T: What the hell is wrong with you?

Me: I'm crampy blah and bloaty blah and bleedy blah.

T: Well, you'll be fine. No body part rip out thing...what you said.

Me: But look, I just read where Ms. Ryan got to have hers out.

T after reading blog post: Dear God, woman! She had fibroids! You have cramps! No! Absolutely not!

Me: *whine*

T: Is Ryan going to be ok? Did you send her a get well card at least?

Me: You always liked her more than me. You suck.

T: Ok, this conversation is over. I'm going back to my desk.

Me: Fucker

T: Love you too, baby.

Someone hand me yarn. Please.

Yarn Porn or Why I Thought I needed More Yarn Or Something

First off, because I know everyone is eager for yarn porn, I wanted to show something I blogged about in May and thought I had lost all the pictures for and I was lamenting the fact because this rocked. This is the Mother's Day basket I made for my mother-in-law and the only reason I wanna post it is because I am damn proud of how it turned out. After being out of retail for almost 6 years now, I still make a kick-ass basket. As always, click for a larger image.

And now, yarn porn! Yay!! Y'all, there's a lot of yarns out there I covet simply because you guys have said how yummy they are. I am, however, a very tactile person. I have to touch things. Anytime I am in any type of store I have to touch. Is that figurine as cool and smooth as it looks? if I walk by a clothing rack I skim my hand along it. So, when it comes to yarn, I have to be able to feel everything. Well let me tell ya, this weekend was a textured dream. So many different feels, wooly, alpaca clouds, angora (yummy!), silk, cotton...just...I think I touched everything in both stores.

The first thing that hopped into my basket at The Woolie Ewe was this lovely.

My first Lorna's Laces. No, I don't knit socks. Tell me how this is relevant to me buying sock yarn. Do you see it? Are you even looking at the picture? Could you have walked by that and said "No, I'll pass"???? I keep taking it out and playing with it. It's so pretty. It's so soft. It's so mine.

Speaking of sock yarn I don't knit, this little beauty jumped into my basket next. No, I don't knit socks. I also don't "trek" so piss off. Mine! My sock yarn! So preeeeetty. Sooooft. MMMmmmmm.

I had just about decided I was done. Three skeins of sock yarn I won't use was enough right? Wrong. I walked past this stuff. I read the label. I did what it told me and now this stuff owns me. I am going to make a big ass square of this stuff and just roll nekkid on it. No, it will not be blogged nor will there be pictures. Just stop that.

If you have never felt this stuff, don't. Just run away. It's yarn crack. It also comes in every color known to God. I got varied shades of purple (that dark one is aubergine, not black) and a cream color. It's going to be divine. It's so soft and cool to touch I could cry.

Next we went off to Shabby Sheep. Again, cute little store, lovely atmosphere and sooo much softness. I blame...uummm.....P-la for this one. This was her fault. I think. Or was it NanC. All I know is someone let me feel it and I forgot who was standing around me. At one point someone tried to take it away to put it up and I slapped at said hand. My apologies to whomever was hand assaulted.

Again, big square, nekkidness and no pictures. This stuff is dreamy. My first thick wonderful alpaca. Mmmmm, Stalker like very much.

Last but not least, I got my first ever Noro. This is silk garden and it wants to be a knit shawl. Anyone know an easy, non-lace, knit from the top shawl pattern that will really show this off? Cuz I am willing to beg. Seriously.
Oh and lest we forget, I FINISHED THE SHAWL!!!!! Woohoo!!!!! Here is most of the full thing looking a bit wonky due to the couch, but it's so not wonky.

It gorgeous and I love it. The feel, the weight, the colors. We are pleased. Also, a closer pic of said FINISHED shawl.

Specs:

Pattern: Sweet Pea Shawl from Stitch N' Bitch Crochet: The Happy Hooker.

Yarn: SWTC Bamboo in the Preppie colorway worked up with an H hook.

This yarn was awesome to work with and I love the drap of it. Very much recommended. So very glad to be done with it. And that, folks, is a wrap. (Buh dun dun)

Recovering

And we're back! Or, I'm back. Whatever. First off, my apologies for the lack of updates last week. I was just soooo excited about the Dallas trip and getting everything completed for it. Monday no post was due to me driving back and being back with the hubby and the puppies and such. So, there it is.

This weekend was awesome!! We had a grand time with the meeting and greeting. The drive wasn't so bad on the way there at all. I got a nice early start so it was cool and traffic was light. I found some decent tunes to listen to and just enjoyed driving. I lurv me a good road trip. Here's one of the road signs at a little more than halfway there. Only 88 miles to go! (Click to enlarge)

And then I came around a corner and look! Downtown Dallas! Woohoo! You may need to enlarge it to see it, but it's there. Yes, I was driving. Yes, I was driving in Dallas traffic. Yes, I was driving in Dallas traffic taking pictures of downtown. I never claimed any sort of intelligence. Not once. Not me.

Then it was on into Dallas and trying to get to Addison. Y'all, Skitter gives good directions. Hotels.com does not. They lie! They told me to go right when it should have been left and they said east when it should have been west. Blah! Grr! Also there was the whole you only stay on this road for 0.2 miles when in reality it was 7 or 8 miles. Lies, I tell you.

Anyway, I make it to Skitter's safe and sound and call her to inform her there's some weird stalker chick in her front yard. Let me tell ya folks, she has a lovely home with plenty of stalking shrubs to hide in (I will forever and ever keep away from the word "bushes" now. If you must know, email me. I am so not blogging it.) and she says her mailbox is wonky, but it's just really laid back. There were meeting hugs and happy smiles and in we go and there's NanC! Woohoo!! Then just like *whoosh* we're off and going. Y'all, I was so out of it they could have driven me to Kansas and I would have just gone along.

We didn't end up in Kansas. No, where we ended up was like a wet dream. It's a yarn shop called The Woolie Ewe and it's the most yarn I have ever seen in one spot. Over whelming is an understatement really. Yes, a purchase was made. Yes, I spent too much money this weekend on yarn. No, I don't care. The shop was cool and the people working there were amazingly nice. I feel really small town considering how excited I got to see my first Lorna's Laces, my first roving, my first lots of things really. I have no idea how long we spent there. I just know things jumped into my basket and I paid for them. Then Skitter and NanC whisked me off to our next destination, Gloria's. "Who is Gloria?" I asked. "It's a restaurant." They replied. I shut up and day-dreamed about my new yarn.

So we get to Gloria's and y'all, I am so plain when it comes to food. I was thinking Tex Mex. This place is so not Tex Mex. It Salvadoran or Equadoran or Cubadoran or something. All I know is the food was good, Skitter doesn't like pork in her pupusa (but she does like her pupusa cheesy) and it's where I got to meet the P-La, one half of the Purling Ps! Woohoo! Here's the 3 of them after we did much gnoshing and laughing (there might have been flirting, I'm not telling).


In the foreground is my purse with the Sweet Pea Shawl sticking out of it. We'll get to that in a bit. After gnoshing, possible flirting (you'll just have to guess), margaritas and me drinking the restaurant out of tea, we went off to the next yarn shop. We ended up at the Shabby Sheep and it's a cute yarn store. It really is. There was a purchase made there too. There was also knitting and crocheting happening for a while. The atmosphere was very relaxing and lends itself to losing time very easily. There were also some very funny moments that, again, I so am not going to blog but I will say that in Dallas, if you need something blocked, Cox Dry Cleaners is the place to go. Someone there just ranted about how much they love Cox. There was much juvenile snickering going on at the table and I thought I was gonna have to go outside at one point.

Before I knew it, our day was up and I had to get to the hotel to get ready for dinner with a family member. It was a lovely evening and I still had Sunday to go.

Sunday was an informal gathering at Skitter's for nibbles (food, y'all. just stop that) and yarn play. What did I work on? Not much. Just fringed my shawl. That's right people it is done!!!! No pictures yet. I am so dragging this out. Hee!! But even better, I got to meet Jen the Purse Ho, and both Purling Ps together. Another awesome day of knitting, crocheting, pressure from the "When are you making a sock" lobbyists (I think Christina called them all to lean on me) and I even got to see Skitter spin. It was awesome! My one regret from the trip is not getting to meet Amanda. Not to worry, my dear. I do believe I will be back up that way in the not too distant future.

Y'all, if you ever want to visit Dallas, this is the group to call. Staying in a hotel room, it still felt like I was just going to Skitter's house so we could ride together. It didn't feel like I was visiting from out of town. I was instantly comfortable and instantly liked all of them. Need a good restaurant? Skitter knows the good ones. She knows them by ethnicity. She knows they have no good Chinese food, but she is still searching. Need to go somewhere? Let NanC drive. She's comfortable with that damned freeway system up there and she is funnnny when she drives. The entertainment value alone is worth going there. Need someone to just lift your spirits and make you smile? P-la is your girl. She'll subtly flirt with you until you're really confused and damn, is she funny. I didn't come away from Dallas thinking "Wow, I met some really cool people." I came away knowing I would be missing my friends and that meeting them in person just confirmed that my stalkees are good people. I really do miss them already.

Friday there will be yarn porn so you'll see my haul from Dallas. Also, there WILL be photos of the completed Sweet Pea Shawl. (Psst, Chris, can I get copies of the ones you took to add to mine?) Until then, who's gonna be in Austin on July 29th for the Harlot? I'm so in.

Updates

First off, hello to all the new people stopping by! And a big thanks to Steph over at Yarn Harlot for linking me and causing the demise of my stat counter. Hee! It's been fun reading all the new comments and the old comments and having unwary stalkees find out they've been stalked for a while now. Hi Rabbitch! Yes, I too lurk, too.

Oh and for those new comment makers that for some reason end up in Earthlink's Spam Folder of Doom and get the Email Rejection Letter That Hurts and Stings, never fear. I always check the evil spam folder first and rescue any comments having been wrongly shuffled off.

Bird Update!

Saturday morning, we got up and let the dogs out as normal and thank goodness they aren't morning people either. They stumbled outside right past the baby bird on the floor. *Whew!* Momma bird was in the room screeching at us, so we hustled out the door with the dogs and let em be. Peeking into the windows, we watched her fly down to the baby while it hopped around on the floor. She then flew up to the freezer and chirped at Baby. Baby chirped back then flew!! To the freezer!! Then Momma flew to the washing machine, chirped at Baby and he followed her over to the washing machine.

Momma then flew to the window in the back door and flew out to a tree and chirped again. Baby flew to the window and sat for a couple of minutes exchanging chirps with Momma. Personally, I think the conversation went like this:

Baby: Why are we doing this again?

Momma: We can't live in the nest forever. You're a bird, you have to learn to fly and get food.

Baby: But you bring me food.

Momma: If you think I'm feeding for the rest of my life, you're crazy.

Baby: Momma, I ain't goin' out there. It's too big and scary.

Momma: Don't you back talk me.

Baby: But Momma...

Momma: Boy, you get your sorry butt out that window right now before I count to 3! 1.....2.....

And with that the baby bird flew off to our fence where she joined him and they flew off. T thinks the Momma bird was calling encouragements to the baby such as "You can do it! You're the best flyer in the world! I know you can fly out here." Pffft. Dreamer.

Crochet Update!

I have no idea where I am on the shawl. I made progress this weekend and noticed I had screwed up one of the edges by making one too many shells and had to rip back 5 rows. Don't crochet exhausted folks. It just causes pain. I was hoping to have it done by this weekend for the Dallas trip and now it's gonna be a booger bear to finish on time. Yikes!

Did I mention I was going to Dallas this weekend? Cuz I am. Did I mention I was meeting knitting bloggers for the first time? Cuz I am. Did I mention that my legs are sore from all the happy puppy butt wiggles happening around here? Yeah. Just you wait til I get to stand up in front of the class for what I did on my summer vacation. All the other bloggers are gonna be so jealous.

Now, there's a list of blogs on the sidebar over there. Go. Read. Comment. Enjoy.

Sometimes Mother Nature Gives Back.

Despite my bitching about trees here lately, life is pretty good at Casa de la Stalker. I just have a passion for trees. Sometimes though, when things seem pretty shitty cuz some bureaucratic asshole wants a wider road so he cuts down all the trees and burns them or your hubby says it's ok to do away with your fruit bearing pear tree, Mother Nature says "thanks for caring" and throws you a treat.

Last year around this time, I was out in our laundry room and reaching for something on our shelf and got this flurry of wings and chirping. I jumped back to see a wren flying around our laundry room. Ok.....weird. It sat on one of my hung up shirts chirp-yelling at me and pooping on my clothing in disdain. I opened the back door and shoo'ed the little critter back into the yard with the plan to close the window on that back door to keep the little bugger out. Got what I was after on the shelf and there, braced between the WD-40 and a box of matchbooks, was a nest. Being as short as I am, I immediately went and got the Sasquatch hubby and made him look. Sure enough there were 3 eggs in the nest. I left the window in the back door open.

A few weeks later you could walk by the shelf and baby bird heads would pop up with their mouths open. We got into the habit of checking the laundry room before entering so as not to disturb feeding time. We set up a fan in the laundry room to circulate air so the heat wouldn't build in the Texas summer and kill the babies. Our laundry room was not our own. The babies did fine and ventured off one day. We missed having the babies pop up.

Since last year, we've bought new cans of WD-40, never moving the one on the shelf. We've used none of those matches. Unspoken between us, we respected the nest, neither one of us touching it, moving it or disturbing it in any way. We never have closed that window in the door.

Last week, I reached for the starter fluid for the BBQ pit for my steaks, and lo and behold but I did get a flutter of wings and chirping. I ran in to get T for the height advantage. He looked into the nest, got a great big grin on his face and lightly thumped the shelf. Up popped one baby bird head. Our diligence paid off and she hatched in our laundry room again.

Inside the nest you can see one baby resting after hatching and 2 more eggs. One of the babies has moved out of the nest and into the box of matchbooks next to it. I do believe we will follow the same nest policy as last year. We love having them in there. We really don't mind being careful in our own laundry room for something this wonderful. We really appreciate the gift this really is.

In crochet news:

My dog is a butthead. I know, this is supposed to be about crochet and the shawl. Bear with me. The shawl is progressing nicely, if a bit slow, and I am still enjoying the heck out of it. I went to photograph the progress the other day so I stretched it out on the couch, turned to grab my camera and turned back to find Alex laying on it. So I reach to move him. He growls. Butthead. Fine, he gets to be in the picture. I gently move the shawl out from under his hairy butt, him growling the whole time and throw it across him.

This picture shows the butthead having gotten his way and the edge of the shawl and the pattern.


This picture shows the butthead now bored with having gotten his way and almost half of the shawl. It's huge, people. It's gonna be.....huger. Or something.


Shawl status? 78% w00t! The score is Mamma-1, Shawl-0, Butthead - negative 15. :oP

Update:

For those of you coming over from Yarn Harlot, welcome! Have some ice tea, relax, leave a comment and get stalked Hehe.

Y'all, Steph's gonna be in Austin on July 29th. I'm there. Who wants to hook up and give her a real Texas welcome? Yeehaw, baby!!!

I Have To Quit Liking Trees.

Renovations here at Casa de la Stalker. We had (until Monday morning) a chain link fence that encompassed our back yard. On the left fence, we had a lovely grape vine (non producing as of yet, but I am hopeful) and on the right fence was an ivy that is just beautiful and hardy. I willingly gave up my vines knowing they'd grow back anyway, neener, neener, neener. For those of you confused, here from a previous post, is the left hand fence.

And here, from a really, really previous post that contained actual knitting content (you may have a moment if you need one) is the right hand fence. With a Sophie bag in the making.



So what did I give my chain link fence for? This.


I've got some butterfly vine going along that back fence next year and some other ideas for the yard now and...........there's something missing in this picture. Dammit all to hell.


See the big red circle?? That used to have a fruit bearing pear tree! They cut down my Pineapple Pear tree! With Pears! See it had a pear tree in that very spot like this.

Ok, you have to click on this next one and make it bigger cuz I have proof ya'll.

And y'all, I totally did my artwork and words with my right hand. I'm left handed. I'm a genius. Really.

But they cut down my pear tree. My husband let them cut down my pear tree.

Et tu,Brutus Thomas?

What The Hell? Friday Already?

Totally random stuff today, my dear Stalkees. Also a serious rant at the bottom you may wish to ignore. It has no bearing on anything.

First off, shawl progress. I'm down to the 14 shell row which, by shell count, means I am 64% done with the shawl. W00t! No, Christina, I'm not done with it yet. I'll get there! Hee No pictures today cuz I'm a slacker and , well, it's the same guys. Just longer and getting more narrow. That's not too totally exciting. Seriously.

If you want exciting: There's a new blog collaboration happening that is completely fictional and way too much fun. Won't you visit the neighborhood and say hi? Oh and go say hi to Sachi. She's like, famous now and stuff.

Also, the highway I drive to work was, until a month ago, a beautiful hilly drive with trees on either side. Now, they are expanding so they have ripped out all of the trees and burned them to expand the highway which totally doesn't even need it. Yeah, they burned the trees. Miles of trees that could have become paper to go for school supplies for homeless kids or lumber for housing for homeless people or firewood for the next winter for people who can't afford to buy any. I mean, seriousy. Just rip the trees up and burn them? I get pissed everytime I think about it. Hey beaurocrats! Fuck you! The tsunamis and earthquakes and hurricanes? Maybe that's Mother Earth's way of saying "How do you like having your homes ripped apart, you bastards??"

Seriously! Why is it that for us to progress we have to destroy something? Why, as a species, do our advances come to the detriment of everything else? Oh, yeah, I'll have more lane choices as I drive to work. I already had 2. I only need one. Gimme a break. Tell the deer, the raccoons, the 'possums, the coyotes and the wild pigs that lived on that land how nice their options are now. I see that raw barren earth every morning and I just want to cry. It's so damn ugly. And not just visually.

It's raining outside. I think I'll go stand in it until I feel clean again.

Shawl Update!

Ok peoples, settle down. I know we're all here for a shawl update and you'll get one. My model is just running a bit late. You know how models can be. She won't leave her dressing room until her hair is perfect and 30 people tell her she really is beautiful and no that last bite of wheat grass did not make her bloat and look fat. Models. Hmmmfff.

So until she gets here, lets look at the shawl itself, shall we? Oh let's! I'm pretty proud of how far along I am and I have a couple of pictures sans moody model. Here we have the shawl doubled so you can see how big this sucker is really going to be. It takes up the middle of my bed so opened? Yeah. Huge. Yay!

Next we have a picture of the pattern developing further in the shawl. I really like how this is turning out guys. I have plans already to make another one and the yarn(s) to make it with. It'll be for a 16 yr old girl, so there's regular yarn and a railroad yarn involved. It'll rock. I'm all excited. Oh, right. Picture. Hee


Ok...no model yet. Well ok, as I was saying, I'm pretty impressed with the shawl so far and my progress on it. I've completed 6 shell rows out of 20 so that's 30% right? No! Wrong! Re-think this. The rows are getting shorter so row count isn't exactly accurate. So I decided to go by shell count because that's really what's important here after all. So with (Bear with me. Math is NOT my strong point) 22 (grrr) shells in the beginning row and losing one shell each row you progress then you're adding 22+21+20+19 and so on and so forth. I know there's a Trigonometry formula for this kind of calculation out there somewhere but high school Trig was my Junior year and that was 17 years ago. Can I get some slack?

Anyway, so it adds up to 253 shells in all and I've completed 117 which leaves all of 136 shells to go. People, I am 46% done already. Almost half! Sweet! Screw the row count! 46%! That's so awes...huh? Oh, finally the model shows up. Ladies and gentlemen, I present Saoirse the lovely in her modeling debut for Casa de la Stalker.

Saoirse: Momma, am I pretty enough?

Me: You're the prettiest girl out there, baby.

Saoirse: But the colors...are they ok?

Me: Oh they're gorgeous on you sweetie. Hold still for the picture.

Saoirse: It doesn't make me look fat?

Me: No Baby Girl, you look nice and svelt. Now hold still for another picture.

Saoirse: Momma, it's nice of you to make me this nice cuddly shawl.

Me: Umm....Baby Girl, the shawl isn't for you. It's for Mommy.

And with that she threw the shawl across the room, stormed out and hasn't spoken to me in hours. Models. Hmmf.

For The Love of 2 Shells

So I worked on the shawl this weekend to some extent. I got another couple of rows done anyway. I spent most of my weekend cooking food on the grill and cleaning around the house. Food wise, we had an awesome weekend at Casa de la Stalker. Saturday afternoon was fresh corn on the cob, baked potatoes and the most expensive steaks I have ever bought from a store in my life all cooked out on the grill. It was amazingly good. See, I don't splurge on steaks. I'm just gonna marinate the shit out of them anyway. But damn, was I ever wrong about meat. These just melted. And I'll never, ever, ever boil corn on the cob again. It gets grilled, baby. Grilled. Just, yeah. I need a moment.

Anywho, Sunday was turkey burgers grilled outside and I just wasn't impressed. We're trying to eat healthier and everything was wheat bread and grilling and turkey burgers, but dammit, I want big greasy burgers from a grill. I'm a total carnivore. I like pink steak. I want greasy burgers. Gonna take some time to get used to the whole turkey burger idea. Is there a middle ground? Some sort of middle step? Like...pork burgers or something? Anything?

So on the crochet front:

I made T drive us to work today so I could work on the shawl. I was delighted to get crochet time in this morning. Brought it to work with me so I could work on it at lunch and during breaks. Got halfway down the row and my yarn must have broken. I feel an end. What the hell? Check the bag. Dammit! Not only did the yarn break, but the rest of it fell out of my bag! I checked as well as I could being strapped into the seat. Put the shawl away until we got to work. Fumed the whole way there. Got out. No yarn. It hadn't broken. I had finished the skein and forgot to bring a second skein with me. Not a happy camper.

So on the drive before I discover what a dumb ass I am, T takes an interest in the shawl.

T: So.....what's it gonna be?

Me: A shawl. Been looking for a pattern like this forever for this yarn.

T: so how big is it going to be?

Me: Not sure yet. I know the top stretches atop the bed.

T: Wow....that's kinda big. Is it supposed to be that big?

Me: Well, it started with 20 of these shells across the top, so yeah. And you lose one shell every shell row until you get to one shell for the point.

T: Cool. How many shells are you at?

Me: *counting out loud* ....17, 18, 19........What the fuck. Oh my God, no.

T: Is..that too many?

Me: *Groan as I count the top row.* ....19, 20, 21, 22. Shit.

T: If you rip that out for 2 extra shells I will tell all your blog friends and they will hunt you down.

Me: *Glare*

T: Besides. It's now 2 shell thingies wider. Most of these patterns are for toothpick women. It's no biggie, right?

I hate him when he's right. I really do. Two extra shells. *Pout*

So Much Hooking I Need A Red Light.

There has been much excitement at Casa de la Stalker recently. I've been getting reservations made for the Dallas weekend and Chris found some rogue knitters for a yarn shop crawl and it's all just. Too. Much. I'm not sure I was this excited about the cruise. There has been much squealing and happy puppy butt wiggles on my part and much rolling of the eyes and finger ticking on T's part. At this point I'm not sure who all I get to meet. My head spins with the possibilities! This also means I will probably have to make future trips to Dallas to keep in touch. Oh. Darn. Hee!

In crocheting news:

Yes, you read that right. I've been crocheting. Have too. Like hooking it up until 1 am "just to finish this row" crocheting. Yeah baby. Stalker found her groove back. See, here's the deal. For about the oh...hhmmm....last YEAR I have had an issue with getting inspired or caring. I have started umpteen projects and either cast them aside or ripped them right the fuck out because I just couldn't stand it. Crochet was making me angry. The yarn stash has been making me angry. Where is my muse???? Where is my inspiration? Where is the excitement of finding a new pattern and knowing just the yarn for it? Hasn't happened.

Well, about a month ago I was in the local Barnes and Nobles and happened to see the Stitch N' Bitch Happy Hooker book. I didn't get all excited. I just thumbed through it then tucked it under my arm in the slim hope there might be something in there worthwhile. Then it sat in my back seat for weeks. So terrible when you can't even get excited enough to look at new patterns.

So a couple of weeks ago, I went to Mom's and took the book in to show her because she collects patterns the way I collect dust. So she goes through the book and gets all excited at how new and wonderful the patterns are blah blah blah....then she smacks me and asks me if I have even really looked at it. Well.....define look, woman. *Smack* Never get a smart mouth with anyone you call Mom. They take smacking privileges. So I look through the book. "Oh wow...this shawl is what I have been looking for for 2 years! Oooh check out the cute potholders with skulls on them! EEEEE an anarchy pattern!!" My butt starts the wiggling and Mom announces "You have neglected cool patterns. In punishment, the book will stay here with me for a while." *Whimper*

No big deal. I've done without this long, right? Yeah. So about the same time as said visit and book confiscation I decide that part of the problem is the gaming. I play both Guild Wars and World of Warcraft. I am addicted to both. I am trying to advance in both. This does not leave much time for anything else. Executive Decision Time!! From now on Tuesdays and Thursdays are non-gamin nights. Tuesdays and Thursdays are for getting my house back in order and crocheting/knitting/reading/movie watching. So far it's been about the cleaning and the reading. Cuz the project I wanna do is in the book Mom thugged from me. Finally I can't stand it anymore and Tuesday I called her and begged her to scan the pattern and send it to me by email. She laughed at me. She said she knew if she denied me the book I would want to crochet so bad it would hurt. Sneaky bitch. I love her.

Tuesday I get home and there, in my inbox is the pattern. Oh sweet yumminess. If any of you have the book, it's the Sweet Pea Shawl here.

The pink kinda grosses me out cuz it's too bright but the pattern! It's sooo sweet. I started it Tuesday night. Chained 202. Got almost to the end of row one with all the shell goodness and realized I was doing the shells ALL WRONG.

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiippppppppppppppppp! *Curse snarl foam rage hate*

So I chained the 202 again and set it aside for the night. Stalker needed sleep to deal. Wednesday? Could not stand it. I kept looking at the pattern off and on alllll day and making sure I had the instructions and understood in my head how it needed to be worked because I want to see this shawl take shape. I'm using this yarn and it's been so fun watching the colors emerge as they are being worked. When you knit with a variegated you get some really cool stripes or pools of color. When you crochet with it, it will at times twist the colors around each other forming a striping in the stitch itself or causing a candy cane effect in a double crochet or, in this case, a double treble crochet. It looks pretty awesome.

Picture huh? No cuz I suck. I got 3 rows of the shell done last night and was exhausted but happy. I will have more done by the time I get home cuz I hate putting it down. If you wanna check back this evening, I'll have a picture posted of the current progress. Although, at this point, it will just look like a jumble of yarn. This thing is gonna need some serious blocking and y'all, this is gonna be a first for me. Never blocked before cuz afghans? Yeah, big and heavy with not so much blocking involved. Ack!

Update! Shawl Progress pictures! Wheeeeee!

Tada!!!


Ok, kidding! Hehe

Here's a picture of the pattern emerging (so freakin cool and I wanna run around with it going "Lookie lookie it's awesome! Squeeeee!")



And here's a close up of some of the stitches that have the really cool color twisty thing kickin'.

And y'all, seriously? This thing stretches across my bed and down the sides a bit. It needs to be blocked. It's going to be huge. Guage what? Where the hell am I going to block this thing? Wonder if the neighbors have an open floor.....I don't think I have one that big! Do I know anyone with a king size bed?? It's going to be sooooo cool when it's done. *Happy puppy butt wiggles*