Aaaaaannndd We're Back!

I thought when I got back that this posting thing would be easy because there would be soooo much to post about. LIES! This is hard because there is soooooo much to post about. Where do you start? Plus, I don't have all of the pictures uploaded onto Flikr yet because I have to buy a pro account.....because I took over 300 pictures.....most of them of water. Seriously. Water.

Anyway, the cruise was a-maze-ing. There was much flirting and booty shakin' and singing and being generally rowdy minus alcohol. If you get a chance to take a cruise, take it. It's so worth it y'all. If you can MAKE a chance to take a cruise, make it. There's really no age limit. Nothing like jamming down with a cruisin hottie (cuz I totally did y'all. Leave the hubbies at home. Just sayin.) to Ludacris and doin a slow sexy booty swingin circle to face the 90 year-old dude behind me slammin around that new hip he got last year for Christmas. That's a good way to burst that we're-all-young-sexy-and-single fantasy bubble you may have had going during the dancing.

Then there was shopping. Y'all, if you take a cruise, plan to take plenty of shopping money or a really good credit card. I now own more jewelry than I ever have. It's all so sparkly and shiny. I'm surprised T let me back into the house when he saw the stuff I was wearing, much less when I pulled out the bags. Yes, there will be sparkly pictures to wow and amaze. As soon as I am brave enough to take them off for fear they will all disappear. Oh and I have to quit petting it long enough to work the clasp.

The first day was not so exciting. I will say the R*oyal Car*ibbean staff was outstanding in getting folks where they needed to go and doing everything in an orderly fashion. We were boarded by 2 pm and had plenty of time to explore the massive ship before we set sail at 6. There were no pictures day 1. I was honestly too busy looking to even think about the camera. Dinner that night was all about meeting the nice folks at our table and feeling the first rockings of the ship as we left dock. Then there was a welcome show and bed. Sleep was needed becasue we knew the next day was gonna be full.

Day 2 we were up at 8 am and headed for breakfast. Then I saw outside and breakfast waited for another 20 minutes as I saw my first real blue ocean water ever. It's amazing. I know that some of you may think I'm crazy and that's ok. Really. But if you have never been to Galveston or anywhere else along the Texas coast then let me explain that we don't have blue water. The water here due to the churning waters and amount of sand or something, is brown. Once you get into water up to your ankles, your feet are no longer visible. The sand here, is brown. The ummm....sky tends to be a little brown due to Texas City, Pasadena, and so on and so forth. So blue water? So cool.

So day 2 we had breakfast by the pool listening to a steel drum band play and watching people play in the pool. Then they had the cruise staff come out and get people dancing. I, of course, jumped right in there and boogied. Then there were audience participation game shows (where I won a big bottle of Kahlua mmmmm) and the casino and sitting on deck listening to the waves crash under the ship. It was so relaxing. Dinner that night was Herb Crusted Talapia for me and mom had Prime Rib. It was our first formal night so it was a lot of fun dressed up in our nicest. Then there was a Broadway style production called The Music Man that included music from Billy Joel, Stevie Wonder, Elton John, Ray Charles and Barry Manalow. It was pretty awesome.

After the show we went back to the room and I changed and headed off for the dance lounge. See, the Staff dancers and singers were doing ABBA and the Village People. Ya just don't pass up ABBA. Then they started the dance music, I got dragged onto the dance floor and boy o boy was it a good time. Until I get the rest of the pictures on Flickr, here at least are the majority of the pictures of day 1. Next post will be Day 3, Key West, Florida and Day 4. Yippee!!!!

It's good to be home.

Bonus Post or Why It's Dangerous To Let Me Blog Before Coffee.

It's a Stalker Sing-A-Long!

<Sung to the tune Leaving On A Jet Plane>

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm standin' here outside my door
I hate to wake up early for anything

But the dawn is breakin', it's early morn
The boat is waitin', it's blowin' her horn
Already it's too early I could die

So hug me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll blog for me
Comment like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a big boat
I sure hope that bitch can stay afloat
Oh, Stalkees, I'm glad to go

There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've blogged around
I'll tell you now, those blogs don't mean a thing

Every site I go, I think of you
Every post I write , I write for you
When I come back I'll join your blogging ring

So hug me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll blog for me
Comment like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a big boat
I sure hope that bitch can stay afloat
Oh, Stalkees, I'm glad to go

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time, oh, let me read you
And close this site and I'll be on my way

Dream about the posts to come
When I won't have to blog alone
About the times that I won't have to say ...

So hug me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll blog for me
Comment like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a big boat
I sure hope that bitch can stay afloat
Oh, Stalkees, I'm glad to go

Bon Voyage!

Hello my Dear Stalkees! Happy Friday and here's to a full week of blogging from yours truly. It should give you something to have fun with while I am gone for next week. Which means no posts until I get back but by golly, there'll be some posting then! I finished the headband in plenty of time to go with and that makes me a very happy camper. Here' a pic of the finished product.

This is kind of a cool pic in that it shows more about me than I usually tell. You can see my daisy chain tattoo on my right wrist in this photo and the fact that I have a wedding band and a wedding set. The wedding set on my right hand was my mom's original set. It's a small diamond in white gold that cost my folks a whopping $50 in 1965. Mom got a new set on their 25th anniversary. My wedding ring was T's grandmothers ring so I'm pretty set for family jewelry. Here's a close-up of the headband.


Yes, it's a silver streak in my hair. Yes, it's natural. No, I am not old. I got that streak when I was 18 and in the hospital. So :P

Gaile over at Fidgety Budgie had a Stash Sale. We now love Gaile for selling gold at quartz prices. I picked up a couple of things and I will pause while you muster up a surprise face.

I got 3 balls of this wonderful sage wooly goodness (Schachenmeyr Nomotto Softwool) that will most likely become Dulaan hats because y'all, seriously, this is some nice thick stuff.



She also had a large lot (10 skeins!) of what she called raspberry colored (coloured for our Canadian Stalkees) Jaeger Matchmaker Merino DK and on her blog it did, indeed look raspberry. Then I got the package. Dudes. She must have some really rich raspberries in her area because I'm leaning more towards cranberry. It's gorgeous. It was going to go to my little sis in some form because she loves all thinks pink. Well, I think not, missy. Look at this color. I want to just roll around in it. I might actually have to crochet myself a cocoon out of this yarn and live in it forever and ever, amen.

Hooray For Packages!

I love it when the postman brings me goodies in the mail. I get to take the Yarn Harlot on the cruise with me!



Alex says "Mommy can sneak me on as a bookend and the cruise people will never know! Who else will be such an adorable book stand?"

Because It's Wednesday, Dammit.

That's why I am posting for the 3rd time already this week. Wednesday. Cuz you know, I stick to that whole Monday/Wednesday/Friday schedule so religiously and never miss a post. So, what to do today? Ooh ooh I know! How about a picture of the headband progress? Yay! Here ya go.



The length is completed and all that's left is to join the ends and run an edge of single crochet stitches around to give it some body. The patter actually makes little X's along it. Not sure what I should call the pattern. Hugs & Kisses Headband? Caribbean Cruise Headband? What do y'all think? Here's a close up of the stitches. (Click to enlarge as always)




I'm really enjoying working on this (thanks for the idea Christina!) and it's going fast enough to hold my interest and since I am kinda making it up as I go along (not to worry, I took notes) it's not like I have to keep checking the damn instructions cuz they are all in my head. This will worry those that know me because, dudes, seriously? I have forgotten recipes of foods I have cooked before. I don't mean I have forgotten how many teaspoons of paprika it needed, I mean, I forgot I had ever made them and eaten them. Yeah. My memory doesn't exist. It's a sad life. Anyway, off to crochet more and play Guild Wars and clean and pack and possibly squeeze in a little World of Warcraft. Hell, I'm feeling spunky. I might even go kiss my husband.

P.S There's been some updating in the sidebar at Casa de la Stalker. There's the lovely buttons Christina made for me (finally) and I updated the buttons for my stalked blogs. I have a bunch to add to the list and I will get to it. Soon. Well, soon for me. :)

Beware The Hair!

Oh my goodness! Can it possibly be? Did Stalker Angie FINALLY post hair pictures? It's all so dizzying....do you need to sit for a moment? Perhaps a warm compress.....yeah, I'm being a pain in the ass on purpose. You caught me. I'm just so afraid you guys have worked yourself into such a frenzy that my hair is gonna be so....boring to you now. Should I stripe it pink first? Maybe get some spikes going? I don't know guys....I don't want you to see it and say "Damn. That was it? This is what we waited for 3 fucking weeks for?"

And yes, it's Tuesday and yes, I posted yesterday, but there will be no posting next week, my Dear Stalkees, for reason of which you all know and don't need to be dragged back up (5 more days! Hot damn!) like a smelly wart that was way cool when it fell off of your butt when you were 7. Cuz, when you're 7? Smelly butt warts are the best thing ever! Or so I'm told. I don't know personally or anything. Yeah. MOVING ON!

Look. It's me. With lots of hair even after a haircut. Enjoy.



My bathroom? Not yellow. The lighting? Not yellow. That picture up there? What the hell? No idea guys. None. Anywho! A back view! With camera on top of my head cuz I'm good like that. We won't discuss the 20 pictures I have of the towel rack next to me.



Told you my bathroom wasn't yellow. :P

Gaming Does Not Make For Good Posts.

So, I spent most of this weekend gaming because I suck and I will slack at every opportunity. Plus, Guild Wars (there's a link over there -->) had a beta weekend for a new expansion that's coming out and anything new is a good thing. I also spent the weekend doing massive amounts of laundry so that all my warmer weather stuff would be clean and fresh for the upcoming (6 more days!) cruise and for some reason I seem to think it's all going with me. If it gets above 60 degrees Fahrenheit this week I am so screwed people. I am gonna sweat my ass off just to keep my laundry clean. Is this normal behavior? Which begs the question, "Normal for who?" Because, ya never know, that kinda crazy crap might just be normal for me.

I also had a conversation with Christina (link for the new folks) last Friday about making something for the trip. She came up with a lovely idea of a bolero jacket for the formal dress I am taking with me to wear. Great idea! Love the idea! I work a full time job and there is only 6 days left. Not gonna happen. She had also sent me some other ideas I liked and latched onto the headscarf like a door from the Titanic. Perhaps I shouldn't make Titanic referrences so close to sail date. Moving on! I was going to use a nice cobalt blue (this blue cotton yumminess) the do the headscarf and realized what a dumbass idea that was when everything I own for spring and is going with me is baby duck yellow, pink, sandy beige, peach......Spring colors. Cobalt blue? Not so much. Gorgeous for the black dress but not for anything else I own.

So off I ran to the stash and lo and behold I do have pink and yellow variegated sock yarn that shall be perfect for a headband on a G hook! Hooray! I started the headband and made considerable headway on it. I'll be finished for the trip. Christina suggested taking the bolero plan with me as my on board project. It is under some very serious consideration. Headscarf progress pics huh? No, I told you I suck. How soon we forget. It is, however, my own design so I may just post it if anyone is interested. My my, a Stalker original! Be afraid. :D

A Real Live Post! About Nothing!

Lots of randomness today, Dear Stalkees. Sorry about the lack of posting, work has just been a real booger bear. We've been implementing all new processes and change is always painful. And slow. So it's still busy here, but I wanted to send you some entertainment. No, this is not it. This is so not entertaining. This first paragraph is about as enjoyable as a root canal. Let's move on, shall we?

So, it's 10 days until the cruise. I still don't have things together. I did get new batteries for the camera. I still need to get another memory card for it. Every time I think about it my brain fuzzes out and quits working. I am soooo excited! I can't wait to get back and share pictures and stuff. Hope you guys don't mind a slide show. I'll try not to drag it out into too many posts and I should probably set up a Flickr account for the majority of pictures for your perusal.

Once the cruise is over, I have plans for around the house. I need to Spring clean the front porch for it is funky dirty, my rocking chair needs a serious hosing down, the house siding needs a good scrub down,I bought a new bistro set at the end of last summer that needs to go on the front porch, but I also want to paint an "area rug" where the bistro table is going. Also, a container garden on and around the porch. And it's almost April. But damn y'all, it's cold! Well, ok, cold for us. It's supposed to get down to the 30's tonight and the high today was near 50. This is winter for us. Usually we're well into the 70's and low 80's by this time of year. Texans are walking around with the stunned looks on their faces and frowning at their sweaters like their clothing has offended the Spring gods in some way. At least the bluebonnets are out.


This is so my favorite time of year. Well, ok, I like Autumn too, but Spring holds the winning spot. Texas roads right now are blue, pink, yellow, purple and red from the wildflowers. It's a beautiful site.

This.....this is why we put up with the heat and the humidity of Summer. Ummm.....more randomness. Oh go check out this video. It needs sound but is so worth it. It rules.

Other than that, there's nothing going on folks. It feels like my life is on hold until I get back from the cruise. It's weird. There's Spring cleaning, pictures to scan in, projects to get back to, yarn dying experiments to happen and planting to be done. I'm hoping to be motivated when I get back. Ah well. Enough randomness for today. Oh, and 10 days ago was my first blogiversary. Here's hoping our next year together isn't quite as sporadic. I'm off to an amazing start!

Late Again...Or Still Late....Or Something

It's totally my fault. See, I was playing Guild Wars with plenty of time for posting and then there was this Underworld run to do and Christina went with us and well....I still had to load pictures. Christina was a good Stalkee and pestered me about my post in game. Check the comments for my last post. She poked me, people. There was POKING. Also, pestering. It's one of the things I adore about her. She keeps me on my toes. Grr.

Anywho, I know I am gonna let some folks down here because there are no hair pics here. None. None of them turned out because T sucks ass at taking pictures. It's like he doesn't even care, y'all. I told him it was for you guys and he was all "Meh. Stupid blog." So I was all "Oh no you didn't" and he was all "Shut up and make me some food, wench." Ok, I totally made that last part up but he went too far. Yeah, he is so sleeping on the couch. Meh. Stupid husband. So I do have pics, just not the awaited photos of the Great Hair Whack Job of 2006. I will get them taken. In the mirror if I have to. I have that much love for you.

Also, the last couple of days have been much better to me. Ok, that was a lie. Today was better for me. I don't know why or what happened or anything. Just..better. We'll take it though. Ooh ooh one thing that made me smile? I was coming out of the grocery store and the moon was full so I wanted a pic of it. Like a good blogger (cuz yeah, this happen ALL the time) I had my camera with me so I whipped it out in the parking lot and took a pic of the moon. See?


I liked how it turned out. So then I turned around to see if anyone was staring at the crazy lady in the parking lot taking pictures of the sky wearing a t-shirt that says "I'm blogging this." (The shirt is the clue people. Watch out when I have it on and a camera in hand.) and the sky behind me was so pretty it made me smile. So I took a picture thinking "Ooh a sky picture for Sandy who doesn't visit my blog but that's ok too." Yeah, my brain is whacked out. Anywho, a picture for Sandy!



I love this picture. A good Texas sunset. So since I don't have any hair pictures (Stop yelling at me! I'll get it!) I thought I'd show you the Stalker Stash and this way you guys can fuss at me when I get more yarn cuz y'all, I so don't need anymore yarn until I use the current stash up. It's...it's so sad. First off we have the shelves of finished objects, wooden beads, knitting and crocheting supplies and so forth.



That's the small section. The next 2 pictures are of just stash. Sitting there. Sad. There are 2 sweaters on the top in the second one that are to be turned into yarn and used for dying. The top tub in the first one is all thread for crocheting. There's just. So. Much.





This last photo is the really scary one. Bags...BAGS of yarn waiting for me. These are all WIPs people. Screaming my name out daily because they so want to be finished and worked on and loved again. And no, before anyone panics, the puppies do not have access to this room. These bags hold 3 afghans, Dulaan hats, a hat and scarf set for my niece in California and...hell I don't even remember what all.



Now feel free to talk amongst yourselves about my disorganization and how badly I am neglecting my WIPs. I can take it. Oh, and Christina, try not to cringe too much over any typos and grammer because you didn't get to correct me before anyone else saw it. Hugs!

Running Late

Today's REAL post will be running late today. Although for me, normally, late means 2 weeks behind, but there will be a real post with real pictures later today. But it will be today. Honest Injun. Before midnight CST a real live post. Yessiree Bob. I umm...forgot to load the pictures this morning and so umm...Running late. So...See ya later, dudes! Yeah. Go away now. Come back later. There's nothing else to read until later.

*wave*

I Have Nothing.

Nothing today. There was supposed to be wonderful things today and they just aren't here. I told Christina in Guild Wars last night, I don't know what is wrong with me. It's not the whole thing with Shu Shu. I can handle that. But at the same time I'll be sitting there fine and all of a sudden I am just weepy. Tears streaming down my face for no damn reason. T asks me what's wrong and I can honestly answer that I don't know. Am I just that damn hormonal? Cuz y'all, this can't be normal. I spent all this weekend laughing, having a good time, watching movies and was fine. Last night sitting in front of the computer and all of a sudden I am weeping. Again. I wasn't thinking of anything that I know of. I think I'm going nuts.

Anywho, grand weekend of fun. Spent the weekend at Mom's house being very lazy. There was supposed to be picture taking this weekend. Didn't happen. There was supposed to be crocheting this weekend. Didn't happen. There was supposed to be other craft projects this weekend. Didn't happen. We watched movies, played games, sang songs, and talked and laughed until it hurt. The whole family has the inside jokes where all we have to say is a couple of words and we are all rolling on the floor. Yeah, it was that kinda fun.

I got the newest Harry Potter movie this weekend and with it was a sample of the Harry Potter Scene-It game. We must own this game y'all. There was yelling, and laughing and screaming answers at the top of our lungs goodness. Most of the time we were laughing too hard to yell out an answer. Rachel, my "little sister" is now convinced that she is psychic because she was guessing everything first. Personally, I think she watches the movies too much for her own good. I am not bitter. Shut up.

Also, lots of coffee. Y'all, seriously, if you like coffee, there's a brand of coffee that starts with F and ends in olger's and they make this new coffee called Cinnamon Swirl that is like sex in a ceramic mug, people. It's.....wow. Also, if you add a bit of hazelnut to it (I like creamer) then oh wow your head will explode in cinnamony goodness and you won't share the coffee and there will be growling if anyone tries to get some.

Yesterday, the guys walked off to a local graveyard that had a section that's really old and overgrown. I should have grabbed the camera and gone cuz that would have been an awesome thing to do for pictures. But there was walking involved, y'all. And I really do love you guys but there was walking. That's so close to exercise it makes my butt hurt. That's a lot of hurt on me.

There was also much flirting this weekend cuz...uumm....hell, it's what I do. I love to flirt when I know it's safe and nobody is going to get all serious and get feelings hurt. So the family? Totally safe flirting. I've already dated one of the sons so everyone else is safe ground. Woohoo! Yes, I flirt with the daughters too, but that ground is so safe it's almost sacred. The only person there's no flirting with? Mom's hubby, Dan. Dan Dan the pizza man. Dan Dan used to own a pizza restaurant when he and Mom met. If I try to flirt with Dan, I get my hair yanked out of my head. So there's no line crossing there. If Dan tries to flirt, me and the rest of the kids all yell "Moooommmmm!!!" as loud as we can and then laugh at him. If I try to flirt with Dan he and the kids to the same thing to me. It rocks. They are such an awesome family.

So a wonderful weekend was had but it doesn't make the best blog fodder in the world and there's no pictures! Where are the damn pictures!! There are supposed to be hair pictures and yarn pictures and puppies and stuff. Also a secret photo project I ain't tellin about so there. Not that it matter because at this rate it will be YEARS, people, YEARS before I ever get it done to blog. So see? I have nothing to talk about. Hopefully Wednesday will be less of a boring post of nothing. Maybe at some point I will update my reading list over there and work on some actual crochet. Oh and maybe get my blog buttons that Christina made for me posted in the sidebar for stealing. I need to quit slacking and start staking stalking. Jeez.

If you want excitement, you are so very lost today.

Blah. For the past 2 weeks, blah. Without going into major TMI (sorry Christina!) my body decided after a year that I am actually female and golly something doesn't belong and let's get rid of it all right fucking now yay! All I know is it had better be done by April 2nd. Or there will be face biting. So yeah, there hasn't been any posting because I knew it would turn into a rant about how much I hate when my body does this and how weepy I get because it's gross and it's proof that I am still not pregnant and blah. Blah. Blah. I also get angry. Weepy + angry does not make for good posting. It makes for this sort of shit I am typing now. Nothing. Argh!

Anywho, to try and get over my late in life teen angst, I went and got a haircut. It's what we do. When we get pissy, we get nails done or a pedicure or buy nice soft yarn that makes us purr. Yesterday, my hair was almost to my butt. Today it is just past my shoulders. I got 7 inches cut off. (Oh hell what kind of hits am I going to get now for typing 7 inches on my blog) I love my hair now. It's actually a little sexy and it makes me look thinner. T LOVES the hair, even though he prefers longer hair on women. I'm not sure what it says about me that a haircut changed my attitude as much as it did. It's such a girly reaction. I'm so not girly. Don't get me wrong, I'm still bitchy. I'm just bitchy while swinging my new haircut around.

I'm working on something special for Monday, my one year Blogiversary is coming up, my cruise is coming up (eek! so much to do!) and my birthday is coming up. Y'all, I'm gonna be 34 here in a bit. That sucks ass. In the meantime....

Hormonal Bitch You are 63% PMS-ing!

Well done, you have PMS and you're not afraid to show it! You know, if you bottle it up, you'll explode one of these days anyway. So live a little! Give your boss a good bitchslap, gorge yourself on Kit Kats. The world will forgive you. Because you're a woman, and you're PMS-ing, dammit!

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 50% on PMS

Link: The PMS Test written by LikityKity on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Manic Monday

Hi gang! Yep, it's Monday. I've been told there is supposed to be a post today. One sec...phone...

I'm back. Ok so we had a really, really laid back weekend this weekend. There was very little cleaning, very little of anything but gaming, couch cuddles and a bit of laundry to tide us over for the week. The most complicated thing I fixed food wise was a bit of beef stroganoff yesterday and some grilled cheese sandwiches on Saturday. One sec.....phone...

Back again. Where was I? Oh yeah, lazy weekend. I think last weekend was just soooo crazy we needed one to recover from it. Good thing too, because work today? Nuts. We had a conference call today at 2 pm. It covered all 4 location. Windsor, Ct., College Station, Tx, Boulder Co., and Bothell Wa. Nobody made one mention of time zone. Every one of us showed up at 2 pm. Our time. Ya'll, this was the longest conference call in history. We missed it by an hour. So we had a small impromptu one. By the time we got done, the Boulder folks were on. The Bothell people are still on it. I bet next time Windsor states the time zone for this sort of thing. Crap...phone....

Ok, where was I? Oh yeah, today? Today is crazy day at work for some reason. It's just...busy. Insane. Anyway, I've begun to notice a trend here at Casa de la Stalker. I've had a few picture of yarn aquisitions, but ummm....not a lot of yarn "content." I'm not working on anything again. Oh I have projects going, but that's so not the same as working on them. This is supposed to be about stalking and crocheting and knitting....and it's not. I mean granted, it's my blog and I can do whatever the hell.....damn phone...

Whatever the hell I want with it but I really do owe you guys some good old fashioned yarny goodness with projects and such. I'll get on that. In the meantime, the phone is ringing. Again.

Hard act to follow. Also known as rambling.

How in the world do you follow up after posting a panty girdle? Y'all, I put panties on my blog. Now what's left to talk about? Ummm....well...oh I know! I had a brave moment last night and went back in the box of horrors (Yes, I threw out the panties. You guys are sick) and I contemplated the bag of yarn intestines. Then I opened the bag. No smell. Good sign, that. So I very tentatively reached in and touched the yarn guts. Oh. My. Goodness. I cannot describe how soft and silky it is. I want sheets made of this stuff. Actually I want a long dress made of it and then to slip it on after a nice exfoliating shower where the legs have been shaved and to walk along and have it rub against my skin. Yeah, it's that good. It's sex yarn.

What do I do with this stuff?? Do I leave it white and once I use it hide it somewhere it will never get dirty? Do I take a small sample and see if I can dye it a satisfactory color and make myself something with it? Does anyone have a clue as to what this stuff could be??? It's like silk. It's jumbled in that bag but not knotted or frayed. A clue? Anyone?

So I went yesterday to get my passport for the cruise cuz you need one now to go that far south into Mexico. I went on my lunch break because I live in a small town. They wouldn't be busy. Nobody goes anywhere. Ri-iight. Two hours folks. That's 2. Hours. Sitting there. And since I was coming from work, did I have any yarn with me? NO! I did not! I had to sit there like a lump and smile at the nice lady with the screaming child like I didn't mind the screaming and there was no yarny goodness to be had. I didn't even have a book. I felt really stupid. It says something when you feel stupid because you're NOT crocheting in public, y'all.

Thanks to all of you who sent well wishes for the boy. He is feeling much better but now gets in trouble if I think he's breathing wrong. He now growls at me when I go to pick him up. If I see him trying to get on the couch, I tell him "No, sir." Then I go and pick him up by his front and back to put him lovingly on the sofa. The entire time he is smiling and growling in gratitude for helping him. I know he is. He loves his momma for taking such good care of him. He loves me so much right now, he is nice and stays out from under my feet by hanging out with Daddy all day. He's so considerate he doesn't even come to me when I call him and offer treats.

He also gratefully growls at me and shows me his pretty smile when I get out the peanut butter. See, his meds have to be taken with food, and if I roll the pills up in peanut butter, he doesn't spit them out. And of course, I went and got him organic peanut butter. The hubby gets Kroger brand. Nothing but the best for Boy though. I have a wonderful sense of priority. Anyway, to get him to take the peanut butter, I have to gently pry his mouth open and rub it on his tongue then quickly remove my fingers before he bites them in his zealousness to get to the yummy peanut butter. Then he gazes at me with love and makes appreciative noises that only SOUND like growling while he takes his medicine. I've had to remind him lately that kisses don't involve teeth, but he's such an affectionate little bugger.

I've been reading a lot lately and I highly recommend The Time Traveler's Wife, by Audrey Niffenegger and Memoirs of a Geisha, by Arthur Golden. Both of them very nice reads. But then, I read a variety of things and use books as my escape from reality. My ultimate brain candy series is the Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series, by Laurell K. Hamilton. Y'all, I really like her stuff. Not because it's deep or cause me to rethink my life or anything like that. I don't read books to better myself. Pffft. I read because I have an over active imagination and this gives it some place to burn off. Also, don't talk to me if I am reading. I will bite your face. It's not pretty. If you have to get my attention, bring a brass band and then run away until I finish the section. But yeah. Laurell K. Hamilton is my not-so-secret-any-longer vice. The books get a bit....umm...racy, but not in a Harlequin romance sort of way. Ugh. I really don't want to read about how he was pulsing and she was heaving and there might have been throbbing involved. And it's not that I mind a good sex scene in a book, but let's call a spade a spade and not a "moisture missile" or "throbbing python of love." Please? Can we NOT call them that?

Well, enough rambling. Now that I've broken your brains and horrified with my choice of questionable literature *snerk*, I'll end this silliness and call it a day.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Update: Y'all, I just read through this post again and it's all sex and peanut butter. I'm not sure what that says about me or what kind of people are going to end up on my blog now. I'm frightened.

Why mail order is scary as hell. Also, why vets rule and dogs are a pain.

First off, I really want to thank everyone for their well wishes in the comments about Shu Shu. I cannot explain how much they meant to me and how much they helped. I spent most of my weekend all weepy and depressed and very ummm.....unshowered. Eww. Am I over it? Nope. Not even close. But I can deal with it today and that's really all any of us can hope for when we lose a loved one. Tomorrow I may be a basket case again. Hell, it may happen by lunchtime. You can never tell. But there is coping and good memories. Moving on.

Warning: This is a loooong ass post. Seriously.

Monday. Yes. Ummm....see.....there was supposed to be this lovey dovey gross post about how T and I met and it was our anniversary and he is an absolute pain in the ass but I love him anyway cuz he puts up with my shit all. The. Time. Wanna know how my 7th anniversary went? Well, I didn't get to wake up to romance or breakfast in bed or little snuggle kisses or just laying in bed with hubby and puppies in one big furry family pile of love and giggles. Know why? Cuz we have 2 dogs in the house still and it is their goal in life to make us CRAZY.

Have I ever mentioned I'm not a morning person? Cuz I'm not. Mornings are for birds and worms and shit. If I see a sunrise, it better be because I am still awake and haven't gone to bed yet. If I have to wake up for a sunrise, do not expect romance and feelings of love from me. I will bite you in the face. My dogs know this. My dogs are very quiet for me in the mornings. They don't even bark at the mailman if I haven't had coffee yet. They are either very smart puppies or I am one scary woman in the morning. So, Monday morning, well before I want to be awake (see depressed, weepy and unshowered), I hear this whining noise. And little yips. And whining some more. So I say in my best mommy before coffee voice, "Alexander, that is enough." See, this is their cue to shut the hell up. And for me, they do. For T they just roll their eyes and keep barking because daddy isn't scary. Daddy is a pushover for doggy eyes. This time the whining did not stop. Wait......no coffee, I said "enough" and there is still pitiful dog noises. Hmmm....

So I crawl out of bed with one eye open (my right eye. My left eye wakes up slower.) and pick up the boy who is whining at the foot of my bed. Because he wouldn't come to me. Again....hmmmm...this is getting weird. Boy not walking. Boy not jumping on bed. Boy whining. Check boy's feet. Y'all, I totally get brownie points for figuring that out before coffee. Now keep in mind we've had a very sick older dog in the house who has gotten all of our attention. The other 2 were given food, water and the occassional pettings, but were pretty much left on their own to rough it out. This does not make me a good mommy. We're working on it.

So what I found was that one of his claws had curled around and was in his poor little paw. Yes, in it. I burst into tears. Have I mentioned I'm not stable right now? Cuz I'm not. Stable. Not even a little. I walk into my computer room where I knew the hubby would be, crying and carrying Alex like he's some tragic figure in a Shakespearean play. My first words to my poor hubby on the morning of our anniversary aren't "Happy anniversary, baby!," "I love you!," or "I'd marry you all over again." They are "You have to help me he's hurting oh my poor boy!!" T thinks the dog is dying because I am just not stable. He finally gets me to calm down enough to hear the word paw. T checks the paws. T find the claw embedded in the boy's foot. T says "Baby, it's just his paw. We can fix this." My mind snaps and says "oh." So we clip the nail, get it out of his paw, clean it up and paw is fine. I feel pretty damn stupid.

We realize boy is really a mess so we start clipping fur. Alex does not like this. It tickles and he hates the tickles. He always snaps at the scissors all big and mean. He finally gets mad enough about being clipped so T picks him up to calm him down and love on him. Boy starts screaming, growling, yelping all at once. What the hell? So we put boy down and the whimpering thing starts again. Boy won't walk on his own. Maybe the nail was not the big thing? So into the shower I go while T calms down the boy. Off to the vet we go, me and the boy. On my anniversary. A hurt dog. After just losing one. Stable? Who, me?

Anywho, the doctor is swamped but will see him today. She finds a tender spot on his back. Boy needs X-rays. I cry. Vet thinks I am an idiot. She wants to keep the boy for X-rays and observation. She wants me to LEAVE HIM THERE AND GO HOME. I cry. Vet thinks I might be crazy. I sit in the waiting room of the vet's office for 6 hours reading a book. Vet has the nice men in white coats on speed dial. Alex gets X-rays and Vet talks to me from across the waiting room. Mustn't stand to close to the weepy mad woman who keeps saying "but we fixed his paw. It's ok now!"

Seems Alex has a teeny tiny bone chip in his back that had gotten inflamed. Boy is on 4 different meds for a month and gets to spend time in a kennel until healed. Have I mentioned I am going on a cruise? I am. I deserve this cruise now y'all. Alex is already better and we are in a power struggle to keep him from jumping on furniture. We don't care about dogs on furniture. We care about him hurting himself. The vet was super nice with him though and I was shocked at the fact that she only charged me $140 for an emergency visit, 2 X-rays, 4 bottles of doggie drugs and putting up with the crazy crying lady. This is why we always use this vet. But seriously y'all. I need a vacation.

__________________________________________________

Yarny Goodness and Scary Mail. Also why the Stalker limits her Ebay time.

So I have aquired some yarny goodness recently because Ye Olde Stalker buys things on the internet when she is sad. Or happy. Or breathing. It's a addiction but I swear there's no program for it. Anywho, there's pictures! Yay! Cheer now my friends, because horror lurks amongst the yarny goodness. I have been tainted.

First off we have a 2 lb skein of what looks like mustard yellow wool. It is, I assure you, a lovely natural shade for now.


This is for dying experiments. Wheee!!! I am looking forward to seeing just how badly I can screw up this yarn. I'm not even joking. I have never dyed a thing in my life except my hair and I butchered it every time. This is gonna be fun.

Next is some lovely yarn from an Ebay company called Jojoland and the colorway is...uumm....hell I don't know. But there's 10 lovely skeins of I don't know in that bag.

I tried for a close up of the yarn and for some reason failed miserably. I'll try again when I get home. I was in a hurry. This yarn is beautiful though. Purples, greens, peach and pink. Such subtle shadings that they look like skeins of different yarns. Click for bigger image. It may help. It may frustrate you further. How brave are you? Mwuahahahahaa.......


The next picture is to show how brave I am. I got a mixed lot of yarn on Ebay for $5 to use for Dulaan projects and such. Do you see what's in the middle of that box? Wooden knitting needles. Worth the admission price, right there.

In the box I found a lot of yarns that will be fun to work with, but I also found some finished stuff. This is a child's size sweater found in the bottom of the box. This will go into the Dulaan box for sure. Works for me!
I also found a bag of umm....well....they aren't circles. They are definitely crocheted but I don't know what the hell they are. They could be butterflies. Maybe. Or yarn amoebas. Or....I just really don't know. I'll find something to do with them.

Then there were also some confusing items that the more I looked at them, the more horrified I got. When they say mixed lot of yarn, I really expect yarn. I know, I'm such an optimist. But this....y'all, seriously. What is this? At first I thought silk. I'm afraid to touch it. The more I look at it the more it looks like yarn intestines. It's very..shiny. And disturbing. I am afraid of this bag. From the outside it's slick...slippery....well, slimy comes to mind.

Then the one thing that finally got me, This doesn't have anything to do with knitting, crocheting, tatting, yarn, crafting........anything. Why??? Why would this be in my charity yarn?? Someone somewhere is wondering where they left these! If these are yours, please let me know and I will send them back to you. Free of charge.

Shu Shu

Back in 1990 when I was 18 and fresh out of high school (some of you stop groaning and thinking how young I am, the rest of you I am not that old, piss off) I got very ill with pneumonia and ended up in the hospital for 5 weeks. When I got out of the hospital, I got to go through therapy due to the trauma (been there, done that, got the white streak in the hair) and a demerol addiction. Part of my therapy suggestions was a pet. At about the same time I was thinking it over, a friend I worked with informed me that her boyfriend's dog was in labor. Off we went. I got there right after the first puppy was born, but I got to help with the second one and hold her as soon as she was born. I claimed her for mine.

I went every day to spend time with this new puppy and get her used to me and so I could get to know her before bringing her home. She was an absolute priss of a pup. I told my mom this and her name became Shu Shu. Because she was very very shu shu and all that implied. Hated getting dirty. Walked with one paw in front of the other which gave her a jaunty little bounce to her walk. She was always happy. If she had been human, she would have been the perfect blond cheerleader. She liked everybody. There were no strangers, only new people to love her. She is the only dog I have ever seen that didn't squat to pee. She launched her back end into the air and held herself on her 2 front feet and when she was done would walk a little ways forward before she ever set her back feet down. She took prissy to an extreme.

As a puppy, she loved marshmallows. She would eat them if you didn't watch her, until her little belly was big and round. Then she would lay on the floor and give little burps. She never begged for food unless you offered her a bite first. If you gave her a bite first, she would then sit at your feet and if you ignored her, she would reach her paw up to touch your knee then sit back down. She was never rude.

When T and I first got married, money was tight and we lived with his folks for about a year. My father-in-law does not really care for animals. He adored Shu Shu. He would carry her everywhere, feed her cheese and treats and get upset if she sat in anyone else's lap. She won him over completely. When she sleeps, she sticks her tongue out of her mouth and when you wake her up, it takes her a good 10 minutes to get that tongue back in. I have proof. Here she is getting woke up by the camera.



Such a princess. At the age of 9 years old she had her first littler of puppies and she was a champ at birthing. Once she got them out it was our turn entirely. Puppies are messy. She didn't do messy. The next year she had her last litter. Five years ago we had her fixed and at the same time had a golf ball sized tumor removed from her stomach. We didn't do a biopsy. She was 10 years old. If it was malignant, we wouldn't have put her through the hell of treatment, and if it was benign, why spend the money for a biopsy?

Last night at around 10:45 I held my baby in my arms, told her I loved her and watched her take her last breath. I cried. I am still crying. I don't know why pets get to us the way they do. I just know it hurts when they leave. My father cried when I told him. My father-in-law cried and dug her grave for her. Today she was buried and all of the family attended. This isn't normal and we have never gathered for any other pet. She was just that special to us. I'm not angry about her death because she had a very long full life for a dog. It wasn't unexpected because she has been spiraling down for 2 weeks now. I'm just going to miss her and her happiness.

Goodbye, Baby Girl.

P.S Dear God, I'm down. Please stop kicking me now, k? Thx.

Not a real post. Ok, not a post about yarny goodness.

Ok, I know I'm behind on posting. And yeah, the last 2 posts don't really count as posts. Usually when I don't post it's due to laziness. Ok, sometimes when I don't post, it's due to laziness. Other times I don't post it's because I am in a whiny bitchy mood and really don't want to spread it to the blogisphere. The rest of THIS particular post is probably going to cross the line into TMI, also it will be boring. Also, there will be large words involved. Also, there will be ugly words. So if you're not comfortable with a peek into the non-yarn related personal side of life, I promise there will be a much nicer softer post later and until then there's always cuddly puppies and kittens.

First off, I'm not writing this for sympathy votes or well wishes or condolences or anything like that. I simply want to explain why sometimes Ye Olde Stalker goes AWOL. Cuz I do. Go AWOL, I mean. Anywho, some of you already know this, but about 4 years ago, my dear hubby, T, was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. For those of you who don't know what MS is, you can read the short version of it here. Basically, it's a very mean disease for those who have it and for those who live with those who have it. It is a degenerative disease that effectively destroys the nerve endings in your brain, spinal cord and optic nerves. T has a version of it called Relapsing-Remitting which is the mildest form you can have. Mild is deceptive. This disease really fucks with you. To top it off, the drugs for it fuck with you too. Seriously.

So T is on this drug called Copaxone which is like a daily injection of angry. T is not angry about his disease. He has taken it well into stride. But the medication he is on can cause mood swings. They do not tell you this at the onset of drug therapy. So T has a really short fuse when it comes to his temper. If he holds it in, the stress can cause his MS to flare up. Ya see where I'm going here? Huh? I knew you were smart cookies. This means T has moments of screaming rage. This means that about 4 days out of the week I get a shit sandwich for breakfast simply because I'm visible. I know what causes this. Usually I just sit and listen to him rant and rave and keep him from harming himself or anything expensive. Some days I lose it, scream back and leave the house. Those are the times I will not post. Those are the days I am angry about his disease and don't want to spread the ugly.

I can't explain it to others because my friends and family think he has been abusive towards me and that's so not the case. He doesn't hurt people on purpose. He has driven off friends before because they couldn't understand his disease or didn't want to. He simply has very little control over his emotions. He can't afford to hold them in too much because, again, stress = MS flare up which = T going blind in one eye or the other for a while. Which causes more stress. Yeah. Ugly ass cycle, ain't it? So anyway, I know folks get worried when I don't show up in their comments or I don't post for a while. Trust me, I'm there. I'm just lurking and being moody. Also, I am the Stalker so I am all mysterious and shit. Ok, yeah, it's just being moody.

This weekend will be us time with no outside influences unless it's the pizza delivery dude with extra cheese. And Dr. Pepper. In large quantities.

Monday = gross lovey dovey post due to Anniversary.

Wednesday = super cool new yarn and book acquisitions post that will make you drool.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Love,

Ye olde moody bitch. Heee

Whatever.

Dear Blog,

Piss off. I'm busy.

Oh, and shadow puppets? Pfft. Lame.

Love,

Stalker Angie.

P.s. You're not the boss of me.

Surrogate blogger

Umm...Hi. This is Stalker Angie's blog here. I don't know where the hell Angie is. She claims she's always working, but I know she's spending time on other blogs. Leaving little comments all over the place. Don't get me wrong, I knew when we first got together that there would be other blogs. She's the Stalker, right? Can't hold her down to just one blog. Still, I do get jealous at times. She doesn't have to spend ALL her time being the Stalker. Maybe she's still over trying to free Norma and her stash from werk.

I hope she's being careful too. I've seen some of those other blogs. Some of them are infected with Ads. She better not bring that shit home to me. You can't get rid of ads once they get into your coding. "Ooh ooh click on me baby and I will show you a whole new URL." I just don't think so. Now don't get me wrong. If your blog has Ads and you're ok with it, I'm ok with it. I just don't want it personally. I've seen what it does to your sidebars.

I also understand she's going on some stupid cruise in April. Is she taking me along? Hell no. She'll ignore me for the entire time. I hear she's taking that flesh-bag who gave birth to her though. Oh sure! I hold all her comments, her precious little photos and clean up all her coding mistakes and what do I get out of it? Nothing. Nothing at all. Where's the URL for that bar? I need a drink. Oh, here, ummm...shadow puppets. Enjoy.

A camel!



A goatl!


A flying bird!

A wee bunny rabbit!

Ok, and now it's your turn. What kinda shadows can you make?


Maybe the Stalker will actually grace us with her presence on Friday. Ungrateful cow...

Grand Opening!

First off, Happy Birthday, Blog Mistress!!!!! Y'all head on over and wish Ms. Ryan a Happy Birthday.

Yesterday was the Grand Opening of the Stalkee Gear store at CafePress. Ok, so the opening wasn't so grand, as it was just T and me. I did send the link to Christina to check out but at least it's up! Yay!! I'm really happy with how things turned out and if anyone sees something they'd like with one of the other images, just let me know. I'll brew it up for ya. Any money made on this deal will go towards yarn for Dulaan knitting. Basically, it'll be the $2 or $3 difference between acrylic and wool so I can make warmer wool stuff to send. Anywho, the link is on the sidebar, go check it out!

Some of y'all expressed a bit of interest in the upcoming cruise, so I thought I'd share a bit of info with ya. I'll be taking my mom with me as she deserves it for raising my sorry ass for so many years and not drowning me which is kinder than I sometimes deserved. She's so excited it's unreal. Makes me so glad to be taking her. Anyway, we'll be going in April on Royal Caribbean cruiselines. It's a 7 day cruise (Sunday to Sunday) and our destinations are Key West/Florida, George Town/Grand Caymen, and Cozumel/Mexico.

I'm not scared of going on the actual cruise, what frightened me is dropping that much money at once. On something that has nothing to do with our house, the cars, the dogs or our marriage. Dropping that much money on a cruise when we may have to replace all of our plumbing (I'll find that out in a few hours), my car needs to be in the shop, T's car needs to go into the shop, all of the dogs are due for a serious grooming for the upcoming spring mud season we are ripping up carpets this year, the walls all need to be painted, the house needs to be leveled (ah, pier and beams) and I want to replace the siding on the house. Then I stopped this weekend and thought about it. I have wanted to do this for a very, very long time. I have saved this money for over a year and a half with bonuses from work that I worked my butt off for. This is a dream of mine that I'm making come true. Fuck the house. I'm heading for the open sea. It's fruity drinks with umbrellas, dancing, sun, water and sexy cabana boys named Umberto for a week! Everybody sing with me!!

Aruba, jamaica ooo I wanna take you

To bermuda, bahama come on pretty mama

Key largo, montego baby why don’t we go

Ooo I wanna take you down to kokomo

We’ll get there fast

And then we’ll take it slow

That’s where we wanna go

Way down to kokomo

Check it out!

Y'all, I totally made this. Yes, it's my second one, but it amazes me every time I finish something that I can actually do it. Plus it's tiny! It's standing next to a normal sized gravy boat for Heaven's sake.

Do you ever finish a project and after all of the knitting/crocheting/tatting/quilting and tucking in ends and such, sit back to look at a finished object and just think "Wow. I MADE that. With my own 2 hands. I f*cking rock, dude!" Yeah, I did that with this bear. I have carried him with me for 2 days now and I kept taking him out and putting him on my desk. He's actually now headed to Washington state to a friend so she can gift him to her sister. I really hope she likes it. If not, she can send him home and we'll be ok with that. Hehe

This weekend I will work on getting the Cafe Press store set up so I can get the prizes set up and sent to the winners. I am so excited!

I also spent yesterday at lunch getting photos taken for a passport. I have been saving for over a year now and April 2nd I am taking my mom on a cruise. A cruise. No seriously,y'all. A real honest to goodness get your ass on the boat we're headed for the Caribbean cruise. I booked it today. Scary stuff that. The kick-ass camera is going with me. I am bouncing off the walls. Wheeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hope everyone has a great day!

Stalker Attitude

When I started reading blogs I was fascinated by the idea that people throw their lives out there for the world to see and wondered how they did so without feeling completely exposed. When you blog you're giving little pieces of yourself away to perfect strangers. You open yourself to hurtful, snide remarks and ridicule. You can't control what people are going to say or think about you and you can't make people be nice.

When I started my own blog, I was all too aware of how mean the world can be, but I wanted a way to share the things I have made and am making, because I am proud of them. I was very hesitant to really be myself. I'm never going to be a consistent blogger. It's really not who I am. I'm an inconsistent individual. Yes, flighty is a damn good word to describe me. I have a short attention span on the best of days, but I find myself being very consistent about one thing. Checking for comments. I live for the darn things. Once I post I check my email every 15 minutes to see if I have any, then if I do, I actually change websites to read them directly on the blog instead of in my inbox. It's a dorky thing to do, but I discovered something on this blog thing we do. It's really not about the blogger. It's about throwing out an idea, a finished object, a vacation photo or 2 and seeing how others react to it. Yes, we put our lives on the internet, but it's in exchange for the little snippets we get back when someone leaves a comment. We find new people to connect with, new blogs to read, new lives to explore with new ideas. It's about discovering a whole new community of people who couldn't be more different and still have so much in common.

I smile everytime I find a new-to-me blog that I really enjoy and there in the comments is a familiar "face." Maybe it's just because Steph, Ryan, Margene, Claudia, Norma and the others are every-freakin-where, but I think we've just got a really good thing going. With that being said, I made a post on Monday about the contest and as usual was waiting oh so not patiently for comments and was a little thrown by them. Then I went back and really read the post. I think I owe some folks a serious apology! I did not mean for that post to sound like a whiney bitch and that's exactly what it sounds like. "Oh my gosh nobody loves me and nobody will play with me and I will just go play by myself screw you guys I'm going home and stop touching my crayons." What was that all about?? I was seriously not upset by the lack of participation and it really was my own fault for dropping the ball on it. Then yesterday, the actual last day of the month I got a submission for the contest. And it's brilliant! What kind of moron sets a due date for a contest on the next-to-the-last day of the month? So yes, my dear, dear Stalkees, we have contest winners. Dear Stalkee Christina sent in a plethora of buttons to use and I think I'll throw them all on. I hate not using any of them since she worked hard on them. Besides, I like them all. So grab a button! You know the drill about saving it on your own server blah blah bandwidth blah.










So Christina wins 2 skeins of the sock yarn of her choice from Knit Picks and a Stalkee mug. Which means it's a damn good thing we had a merchandise entry or she'd be getting a nice blank mug and some crayons.

The entry for the merchandise came from Michelle, who is obviously very talented. She went in a direction I hadn't even thought of and executed it brilliantly. Now I have to decide if I want to use the lines version, the color version or just use both and have a choice. I like having choices. So Michelle, you are the winner of a Stalkee gear T-shirt with your design on it, a set of 8 stitchmarkers made by me with your choice of colors, and a shopping spree of up to $35 at KnitPicks. I have your email addy (muahahaha) so I'll let ya know how I have it set up and get ya taken care of. You might wanna head over and start some window shopping. :^D So without further ado, my Dear Stalkees, the winning (ok only but it still rules) submission(s)!





Sheer brilliance! So what do you guys think? Way to go you two!! Big stalker hug to the both of you.

Hope everyone has a great day!

Deadline

Ok folks, deadline for the contest? Today. Number of entries for merchandise? Zero. None. Nada. I did get one button submission from Christina and that will get posted on the site for anyone who likes stealing buttons because it is a very cute button. So, unless something shows up in the ol' gmail account by midnight, Pacific time tonight, Stalkee gear will just have to wait for a while. I'll probably work on something in the near future. I do have to say, during the contest time frame, my life did get busy, I got sick and I dropped off the grid for a while. My own fault. You can't start a contest and then *poof* disappear from the blogging world and hope for a good response! So, anywho. There it is. I'm gonna go crochet a tiny bear now.

Hope everyone has a great day!

Stolen meme!

With her permission, I stole this meme from Christina. Wait, if I have permission, is it still stealing? Maybe I just borrowed it from her. If I just borrowed it though, do I have to give it back? I doubt she wants it back really. Well, that's not very exciting and now I don't want to do it. Which is stupid because now what am I going to talk about? This was supposed to be a nice lead in about stealing since it's one of the questions on the meme and there was going to be this big tie in with the meme and my beginning paragragh. Now I'm just rambling about whether or not I really stole the damn thing. This sucks. I wanted to do a stolen meme. Ya know what? This meme was totally taken without permission from Christina's blog. In fact, I bet she's pissed when she sees I stole it. Now I feel better.

Now before we get into the meme, you have to go see Ms. Ryan's blog and see the Dulaan photos of last years distribution in Mongolia. Take tissues. You've been warned.

The Great American (Totally Stolen) Onion Meme

I won't be passing this on. Just steal it then leave me a ransom note in the comments so I can visit it. It's more fun that way, trust me.

layer one
name: Angie
birthdate: April 18, 1972
birthplace: McAlister, Oklahoma
current location: Navasota, Texas
eye color: steel blue with brown around the pupil and brown streaks. Yes, they are as weird as that sounds.
hair color: dark brown with blond stripes. I love stripey hair.
righty or lefty: lefty (Grandpa says this is why I do everything bass-ackwards. hehe)
sign: Aries. take it as you will :)
innie or outtie: so far in I could give small woodland creatures a home

layer two
heritage: If it was part of Europe at any given time, I have it in me. Oh and some Native American too.
shoes you wore today: My plain jane white K-Swiss tennies
your hair: long and curly. tangles if I even think about it.
your weakness: my nephew and anything too small to care for itself
fears: being sick, losing my hubby
your perfect pizza: Cheese with a butt load of sauce. And more cheese. Oh and some melted cheese on top of the cheese.
one thing you'd like to achieve: having a baby. not as easy as these teens make it look, let me tell ya.

layer three

your most overused phrase: yay!, hooray! and piss off....
your first waking thoughts: He better have coffee made. I know he's not waking me up and not having coffee made. He loves me and there will be coffee. Damn I hafta pee.
the first features you notice in the opposite sex: the butt. I have a weakness for nice solid round male booty. I hate this baggy pants fad. I miss the 80's and their tight Levi's!!!
your best physical feature: I have been told I have a cupid's bow mouth. It requires me to shut up long enough for you to see it though.
your bedtime: It should be around 10 or 11. It's usually around 2 or 3 am.
your greatest fear: losing my husband or another miscarriage
your greatest accomplishment: getting out of an abusive relationship

layer four
pepsi or coke: Dr. Pepper. Those other 2 are swill.
single or group dates:I don't think I've ever been on a real date. Let's just leave that alone, shall we?
adidas or nike: K-Swiss!
lipton iced tea or nestea: So long as it's sweet and not that instant shit, I'l drink it.
chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla. mmmmmmm
cappuccino or coffee: Either one so long as there is vanilla creamer or flavoring involved. I really like vanilla.

layer five

smoke: Yes. but trying to quit
cuss: Too much.
sing: Whenever there is an opportunity. Now looks good. Yes, I even sing at work. :)
take a shower everyday: Yes, but I don't wash my hair daily. Too damn much of it.
have a crush: Nope
been in love: Yep.
went to college: I did a couple of semesters in nursing school, but we moved so much back then it was too hard to start nursung school.
liked high school: Only my Senior year.
want to get married: Actually, I never wanted a husband, just kids. Hmmm.....
believe in yourself: Usually
type with your fingers on the right keys: I type 40 words/minute with all of 3 fingers. Sometimes I even spell those words right. I'm a good speller. I am a bad typist.
think you're attractive: I'm cute as hell, does that count?
think you're a health freak: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAhahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!! No.
get along with your parents: Always now. Didn't when I was in my twenties.
play an instrument:I never really wanted to play one. It takes too much concentration away from singing in my mind.

layer six
in the past month, did you..
drink alcohol: no
smoke: yes
do a drug: Illegal? no
make Out: yes
go on a date: nope
eat an entire box of Oreos: no
eat sushi: eww
been on stage: I wish :(
been dumped: Aww hell no.
gone skating: no
made homemade cookies: no, but I did make muffins
fall in love: That's the fun thing about marriage. Love is always there, but you fall in and out of love on a daily basis.
go skinny dipping: nope
dyed your hair: No, but I really need to either get my stripes done again or have it dyed back to original color. I currently have 4 different colors in my hair and only the dark brown and gray are natural.
stolen anything: This Meme! Hah! Told you there was a tie-in!

layer seven
have you ever...
played a game that required removal of clothing: Yep.
if so, was it mixed company:Yep.
been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Absolutely. Mexico and $3 worth of 25 cent tequila slammers will do it every time.
been caught doing something: Define something *blush*
been called a tease: Nope, but that's not necessarily a good thing.
gotten beaten up: Yep. Severely. But I've given a few beatings in my time as well.
shoplifted: Nope
if so, did you get caught: n/a
changed who you were to fit in: I changed in high school, but not to fit in. Just to make myself happier and all i did was let myself be me.

layer eight
age you hope to be married: Never, but it's too late now!
numbers and names of children: Zero so far, but we have 3 fuzzy children.
describe your dream wedding: Never dreamed of getting married. Never wanted to be married. Looking back, my dream wedding would be to elope. hehe
how do you want to die: Truthfully? I don't want to, but if it has to happen, I'd like to just fall asleep and not wake up.
what do you want to be when you grow up: Not grown up. I want to be a child forever. I never want to forget how to play. I don't mind paying bills, but I want to remember the joy of blowing bubbles on a Spring day. I never want to forget how funny the word "poop" is. I want to always appreciate the smell of puppy breath and how puppy kisses tickle your nose.
what countr(ies) would you most like to visit: Ireland, Scotland and Australia.

layer nine

number of men i have kissed: Ummm...lots actually. I'm a kissy sort of person. I like a good lip lock. Not the slobbery kind. Eww.
number of boyfriends you've had:Ummm...technical boyfriends? 4. Those other people were, ummm....just friends.
number of drugs taken illegally: I have smoked pot in the past. The far past. My nephew is not allowed to read this post.
number of people i could trust with my life: Quite a few actually. I can count at least 10 off the top of my head.
number of CDs that i own: Probably somewhere between 20 and 30. It's a pretty serious occasion if I buy a CD. I'm a radio type of girl.
number of piercings: Zero. I used to have my ears pierced, but those have grown in.
number of tattoos: 5. I would love to get more, but T hates tattoos.
number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: Quite a few times due to being in choir.
number of scars on my body: 3 major. Lots of minor.
number of things in my past that i regret: Just one really. Never getting to sit down and crochet with my grandmother and getting to hear her laugh while I crocheted in my "weird little way of doing things right-handed" when I am a left-handed individual. This always made her giggle at me. "Yer left-handed, Angie girl! Why do insist on doing things with yer right hand? Never did make no sense to me."

Hope everyone has a great day!!

The Stalker gets weird.

Greetings and salutations, my Dear Stalkees! Yes, tis I again. Yes, I know it's been 13 days since I posted last but calm yourselves I shall explain. I have been quite ill for 8 days so I'm really only a few days late posting. Sick time doesn't count. Does not. Cuz I say it doesn't, now let's move on. I missed all of last week work wise and the suckiest part of all this? The part that seriously sucks donkey butt? I was off an entire week of work and didn't get very much crocheting done. I was too sick for playing with yarn. Too. Sick. For. Yarn. I'll let that sink in for a moment. Take a deep breath, it's ok.

I did get some stuff done but for the most part, concentrating on anything made me very nauseous. So what do I have to show for a week off? Well, I got the rest of the 40 squares done for my sister-in-law's afghan. Pictures? Hell no. I can't think of anything more boring than a picture of 34 small white squares. I did try to do the photo thing. They all turned out so pathetic looking. I even took pictures of the squares outside. Ya know, silly little squares frolicking in the warm Texas winter. It looked more like a crochet massacre happened in my front yard. The Texas Crochet Massacre, if you will. If they had been red squares, I could have shot a video and gone to the Sundance Film Festival with them. Revolting.

I also started another fun little project during my adventures in illness, but that has to wait for the next post. It really deserves it's own post in all it's cuteness. So for now, we'll head off to a meme! Yes, I got tagged and it's actually a fun little one. I was tagged by Angi and you really should go take a peek at her blog. Her banner is highly amusing. Ok, it might have been the drugs, so go check it out and report back, would ya?

***Ground Rules: The first player of this "game" starts with the topic "5 weird habits of yours" and people who get tagged need to write a blog entry about their 5 quirky habits as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next 5 people to be tagged and list their names.***

Coming up with 5 is no big deal. Coming up with 5 I'm willing to admit to? Yeah. Whole new ballgame folks.

1.) I will sing to anything. I adore singing. I'm not great but I don't just suck ass at it either, but I will sing at every given opportunity. Fun little jingle on that commercial? Gonna sing it. If you play music I like during dinner, I will sit there and starve. Must sing. It's like the opposite of Pavlov's dog.

2.) I am terrified of doctors. Dentists? No problem. I get scared every time I have to go to the doctor, even if it's just for a checkup. Yep. Weird like that.

3.) I have to eat in order. I know I've discussed it before, but it's good an weird. I can't mix my food, and I don't mean it not touching. I mean I can't take a bite of one thing, then a bite of another. I have to eat all of my broccoli, then all of my corn, then all of my meat....yep. I even turn the plate so that whatever is next is in front of me.

4.) I like small spaces, but I hate being crowded. If I woke up in a coffin, I'd be fine. If I woke up in a closet, I'd be fine. If I woke up in the mall at Christmas time I'd have a panic attack after about 10 minutes because of all the people. And it's not that I don't like people, I just don't like being crowded by them. I have a very serious personal space issue.

5.)I am a quick learner but I have a very short attention span. This leads me to finding things I wanna learn to see if I can, then quitting to move on. I wanted to see if I could paint. So I did. it wasn't bad. I'm kinda done now. I wanted to learn to knit. I basically know how. I'm kinda done now. I wanted to learn how to build computers. I know how. I don't because it's boring. This is pretty much the story of my life. Ooh something shiny! Oh, ok, it's not so shiny now. Next! The hubby has lasted the longest of all my projects. Thank goodness marriage always changes. Hehe. Next!

Ok, so do I want to perpetuate the vicious cycle that is a meme? Tell ya what, if you wanna do it, feel free to do so and pop over to let me know so I can check it out. I've done the meme thing. I can do it fine. Need to find something else to do now. Guess I could work or something. :)

Hope everyone has a great day!

Update: Because I know everyone really wanted to know, I went back to the doctor today because I wasn't feeling well still. He yelled at me for going back to work too soon and I now have a urinary tract infection because of the previous medications. It's things like this that makes the baby Jesus cry. I can't. Stand. It.

*Ahem*

This is what my G-mail account looks like today. Click on it for a larger, sadder image. This is the inbox that is supposed to be chock full of design ideas. Now, before you think that this is really sad, there are personal emails I have hidden in some other boxes, but none of them have designs attached to them. Yes, the deadline has been pushed back to the end of January, but I think we need some motivation. Remember the prizes involved? No? Well, they rock. You want them. Trust me on this. In fact, let me just recap the contest we are having here at Casa de la Stalker. Yep, this is just parts of the original post all over again. We'll be ok. Take my hand, no, not that one, it's holding the yarn. We'll get through this.

Original post:

Ok so here's the deal. We're going to have a contest at Casa de la Stalker. Yay!!! One of you lovely people will get to design the Stalkee gear. That's right! You heard me. I would like you guys to submit designs for the merchandise. It will be a small something on the front with something larger on the back. Is that vague enough? Hehe

What I had pictured (but then I have a sick mind) is something along the lines of a female figure, dressed in black, sneaking/tip-toeing along with a small black mask on. There should be yarn involved. But then again, that's just my mind. What says Stalker to you? What should the saying on the back be? All entries will be welcomed, but please try to keep them mostly family friendly. While I might find pornographic banners entertaining and worth a chuckle or 2, other folks may not. Also along the way, I am hoping to get a new sidebar button for the blog out of the deal. I know. I'm sneaky. So submissions will be front and back ideas for merchandise and/or a blog button.

Update: Multiple submissions for merchandise design and/or sidebar button are welcome. Feel free to submit as many designs as you would like.

As mentioned this is a contest. That means prizes! Yay!!! It's good ones too, let me tell ya.

1.) Winner of the merchandise design contest, will get a Stalkee gear T-shirt with their design on it, a set of 8 stitchmarkers made by me with their choice of colors, and a shopping spree of up to $35 at KnitPicks. That, my dear Stalkees, is quite a bit of yarn/patterns/books.

2.) Winner of the blog button contest will get a Stalkee gear mug and 2 skeins of the sock yarn of their choice from KnitPicks. If more than one button is used, all of the other submissions used will win a Stalkee gear mug. Buttons are for the sidebar. This isn't a banner sized thing. Think in terms of small please. :)

3.) Due to the upcoming holidays and the fact that people actually may have better things to do than to design stuff for me (I don't know what it would be, but there you have it), the deadline for designs is December 30th January 31st. Yes, 2 months is a long time, but not when there is Christmas knitting/crocheting/crafting to be done, gifts to wrap, homes to decorate, parties to attend, jobs to go to, children to raise and significant others to coddle cuddle.

4.) Please send all submissions to stalkerangie AT gmail DOT com. I think you can figure it out from there.

5.) For the merchandise, it will be through CafePress and they do have image guidelines. The following links should help with any questions you have on that end.

Beginners Image Workshop (A general FAQ on creating images for CafePress.)

Product Templates (A general idea of image sizes per product.)

If there are any questions, comments or you just think I'm off my gourd, shoot me an email or leave your email addy in the comments.

It's all about the prizes anyway. Hee

Happy New Year!

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary describes the word "Resolution" in the following manner:

1 : the act or process of reducing to simpler form: as a : the act of analyzing a complex notion into simpler ones b : the act of answering : SOLVING c : the act of determining d : the passing of a voice part from a dissonant to a consonant tone or the progression of a chord from dissonance to consonance e : the separating of a chemical compound or mixture into its constituents f (1) : the division of a prosodic element into its component parts (2) : the substitution in Greek or Latin prosody of two short syllables for a long syllable g : the analysis of a vector into two or more vectors of which it is the sum h : the process or capability of making distinguishable the individual parts of an object, closely adjacent optical images, or sources of light.

Huh?? Ummm....yeah. That is just way to confusing, but that's not why I swore off New Year's resolutions. If I resolve to lose weight, I will be bigger by June. If I resolve to quit smoking, I'll be up to 3 packs a day by August. I'm just one of those people. Stubborn and bull headed. Now, if you were to tell me that I would die in 3 months unless I took these pills, I'd take the pills. If you told me I had to take the pills or I would die, start the funeral preparations. I don't have to do anything. Yes, it seriously is that bad. Yes, it is retarded. I take direction well. I don't take orders worth a damn. Military was definitely never in my future.

Take for example, my early relationship with my dad. My dad believed in corporal punishment. He spanked us when we did wrong but he never took it too far. Now, he spanked my 2 older brothers well into their teens. He quit spanking me when I was 5-years-old. Not because I was his Little Princess, although I am, but because he was afraid he was gonna kill me. See, the boys had it down. Daddy spanked us until we cried because he felt if we cried, we realized we had done something wrong and he would give us time to calm down then have "the chat." (I hated that shit too. I always felt it was throwing mistakes back in my face.) The boys would let him get a good 2 or 3 swats in and then "burst into tears." They would then go to their rooms for a few minutes, then come out and apologize. Apologize! Brown-nosers.

Anyway, my brothers explained the system to me over and over. They didn't want me to die unless they got to do it themselves, and watching the battle between me and my dad was taxing on everyone in the household. Now, let me interject here that it was a rare occasion that I got a spanking. I was one of those kids that felt disappointing an adult was the worst thing that could happen. If you wanna be mad at me, fine. If you hate me, fine. If you're disappointed in me I'm crushed. So when I messed up, all you had to was tell me I had let you down and I would bend over backwards to fix it. Spanking me is downright dumb as hell. I was already upset. I always felt there was no need to add to it because nothing could make me feel worse than I was already feeling, so spankings really pissed me off.

Now, picture if you will, a little blond girl (cute as hell, I might add), quick to laugh, painfully polite to adults and thought Shirley Temple was the epitome of what all good little girls should be. Not a picture of rebellion, right? Yeah. Until I got bent over a knee. Then I would hear my brothers saying in my mind, "Angie, just cry! He'll stop as soon as you cry." Pfffft. I would not cry for him. In fact, not only would I not cry, I always took it one step too far. I turned my head and glared at him the entire time. I never said a word, I just glared. Which made him mad enough to actually hit harder. Which made me glare harder. This was a very vicious cycle. I remember my mom slapping my dad once to make him stop. I was the only one who ever made him lose it that bad. And I never cried during spankings. I always cried once I got to my room, but never in front of anyone. I really am that damn stubborn stupid stubborn.

Which brings us back around to why I don't do New Year's resolutions. I always break them. I guess subconsciously it feels like being told what to do. Yeah, it's silly and I psychoanalyze myself every time I do it. Anywho, so no resolutions for me. Ok, that took forever to get to, didn't it. Do you guys have any resolutions for the new year? Any of you have any strange psychotic reasons for not making resolutions? Any of you think I should seek therapy for many, many years to come?

Ya know, this post was supposed to be about things I learned over the last year. It turned into this. Who'da thunk?

Hope everyone has a great day year!

*Update: I guess it was inevitable. I have a Frapper Map. I was suckered into it somehow. I am merely a sheep following blindly behind. Go put in a pin before you sheer me and turn me into a sweater.