It pays for the yarn, it pays for the yarn.....

Ok, so first off the meme. Cuz this one just cracked me the hell up. It really did.

Google your name with the word "needs" and post the top ten results.

Angie needs….

10.) An agent to become an actress. (I’m ready for my close-up Mr. De Mille.)

9.) A bed! (Ummm…..I have one. Really, I do.)

8.) Some self esteem and self love so she can make her romantic decisions from a strong standpoint and not from neediness. (*giggle* see previous post and piss off. *snerk*)

7.) Beads! (Woot!)

6.) Your help. (But what do I need it for? Self esteem, a bed or beads??)

5.) To receive both emotional and substance abuse counseling. (I’m a bigger mess than I thought.)

4.) A hat. (Do not. I look stupid in hats.)

3.) That abnormally thick facial hair. (Hahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

2.) A man. (I have one thank you. No woman is stupid enough to really want 2.)

1.) A night of blinding sex. (Yes. Yes I do. Don’t we all?)

Too fun. Thank you Erin!

Ok so……oh yeah! Work. What the Stalker does to pay for her internet access to stalk knitters with. I work for a company that writes policy management software for insurance agencies. My part of the job is really quite simple. I am in charge of the admin duties for the agencies on one of the applications we support (changing passwords, changing users, adding/deleting users, etc.) and I am also one of the few people on a new project to create an after hours service for our agencies to turn their phones over to during meetings or after hours. We’re like an answering service, but we have access to the policy information and can make some changes. Well, we typically have an influx of agencies sign up for this service during natural disasters so they aren’t over run with claims calls. Granted, disasters do NOT bring out the best in people anyway, but ferfucksake!

People will play whatever card they think they have to get their money quicker. They really will.

Caller: Hi my name is Jane Smith and I am 96 and my husband had a stroke 4 years ago.

Me: Ummm….Ok, Ms. Smith, how can I help you?

Caller: Well I need my insurance money.

Me: Well we recommend you call your carrier to expedite the claim process.

Caller: I am 96 years old and I can’t be making all of these phone calls!What the hell good are you? Why are you answering the phone??

Good question. Another issue I find is people just generally are selfish. Some are ok. I will get phone call after phone call from families who are patiently waiting on an adjuster because their home is GONE, obliterated from the face of the earth. They are homeless but they understand that the agencies are busy. Or they have been living in their SUV for a week and is there anyplace the agency knows of they can go until the carrier can get back to them? Or they have been out of money for 2 weeks but they hated to call because they know we are busy. I really feel for these people.

Then there are the ones I wanna stab. Their business lost 2 shingles from the roof and they want an adjuster that will cut them a check right this instant because they might end up with a water stain on their ceiling. These people typically scream into the phone. I cannot describe the feeling when you answer the phone and all you hear is “I was in the hurricane. Where’s my damn money?” Yes, they really do start the conversation that way. I also have a pet peeve that is horrible to have when living in the South. Southern gentlemen do this without thought and get upset if you get offended by it. Do not, in any sort of tone that might even be considered close to derogatory or condescending, call me a pet name. Normally this does not bother me. People call me hon or sweetie all the time. But these southern men…….I am not your honey, darling, sweetie, sweetheart, dear, or dumpling. Do not call me that or I will crawl through the phone and honey dumpling your arse. Grrrrrrrrrr.

Oh and the other thing that drives me bat shit. Names. I don’t care how many Swartinoski’s you have in your little podunk haven. I have never heard the name and cannot instinctively spell it. Also, if you are spelling you name over the phone, I have some bad news for ya. The letters B, C, D, G, P, T, V and Z all sound the fucking same. So do M and N. I promise. They really do. So don’t be upset when I repeat it and you spelled Davis, but I start out with B as in boy. It’s your own damn fault for not being specific. Oh, and if you have an easy name, please don’t spell it out unless it is spelled in some retarded way. If you’re name is Lynda, don’t get pissed cuz I spell it Linda. Seriously. I had one caller…I swear…. His name was Bob and his last name was something like Wasznowskiwinski. Yes, it is an exaggeration, you get the idea.

Caller: I need you to look up something on my policy for me.

Me: Ok sir, may I have you name, please?

Caller: Yes, it’s Bob Wasznowskiwinski. B-O-B.

Silence…….

Me: Can you spell you last name for me?

Caller: *Heavy ass sigh* W-A-S…

Well pardon the hell outta me, Bob. I guess in you’re part of Podunk, USA, Bob is pretty unfuckincommon. This happens more than you may think. Why people? Why does this happen? Why do make me want to hurt you?

Ok, I promise I am almost done bitching. My last bratty complaint is leaving messages. Why…..why for the love of all things wooly, do people SPEED UP when they get to their phone numbers? They will drag out a 10 minute voicemail with ramblings of why they are calling and how their call is the most important call I will take today and please for the love of insurance agents everywhere call them back…..then when they get to the phone number they are on speed and helium. They hand the phone over to The honest-to-god Chipmunks when they get to the part of leaving their phone numbers. Then I get to listen to the message at least 2 more times because I got the area code on the first pass. So the 2^nd pass I might catch the prefix and that just leaves the last 4 numbers. It’s like a game. How many listening sessions will it take for her to get the number? Only the shadow knows…..

The worst part is, I love my job. I love what I do. I even love most of the people I talk to everyday. So I shall soldier on and all that rubbish and just deal with the scum that seeps through occasionally. Besides, I have all you lovely people to turn to when I start going insane. :o)

Next post: Actual fiber content, including current projects, stash enhancements and just general yarn porn.

Hope everyone has a great day!

TMI or Why The Stalker needs to learn what "polite conversation" is.

Ok, first off, some of you just need to drop the needles. I am not pregnant. Not for lack of trying, mind you. But I have to take fertility drugs to get preggers, so until I lose some weight, I ain't takin the drugs, so it's not gonna happen. Sorry. I know there was hopeful fingering weight being cast on out there. Your day will come.

I have some personal things to say in this post before we get down and dirty, so here goes.

Chelsea, congrats on winning the stitch markers. I will be mailing them by weeks end and I really hope you enjoy them! :)

Christina, Welcome back! Glad to have you back with us on the ol' interweb thing. Glad to hear Daisy is doing fine and I am waiting on the pic of the garter. Oh and your package will be in the mail by end of week as well. Hehe

Ms. Ryan and TMK, Happy Belated Anniversary!! It sounds like you had a good one and I cannot think of two people who deserve joy in their lives with one another more. Awesome post by the way, TMK. Just hope the Blog Mistress was able to get all of the Mac germs off of the blog. Heehee

Ms. Steph, I was so sorry to hear about your loss. I wanted to post to you when it happend, but it seemed to happen when I was emotionally raw so I just sat on my couch and bawled for you. My thoughts were, and are, with your family.

My Dorky Friends, I love the meme and will fit it in tomorrow next post. Erin the shoes are to die for and I must have some. The pattern WILL be mine. Mwuahahahaha.

Norma Dear, niiiice spinning there, hon. Very nice. Must resist the siren song of unspun fiber.

For those of you who are uncomfortable with hearing personal stories about complete strangers, the rest of this post is not for you. Come back tomorrow or the next day and check back. There will be too much info here. Last warning. I may discuss blood and mucus. Just saying.

I know a lot of you were concerned about me during my hideout time, and I really am sorry for making you worry. It was not my intent and I should have posted a short hiatus, but I couldn't even do that. After the hurricane that never came near us (I've had outdoor ceiling fans stir the air more), there were a lot of factors contributing to my.....well...it wasn't really a breakdown, it was more of a withdrawal. The hubby has been out on short term disability for 3 months (that is soooo not short term to me) and is driving me nuts at home. Work has been crazy due to the hurricanes (have I ever mentioned what I do for a living? hmmm), the game I play online to reduce stress has become an issue due to guild politics, name calling (we're all adults people!!), and general stupidity. plus one of the people I have really grown to care about on that game tried to commit suicide and there's not a thing I can do about it. So, I pulled back away from people for a while. But, I will blog more about those subjects later.

A week after the hurricane I also got sick as hell. If you could combine mild pneumonia with bronchitis and the flu, then that would be what I had. I was a walking snot factory. There was coughing until my bladder said "screw you, lady" and I spent time sitting on towels. There was coughing until I threw up. There was coughing until there was blood involved and the doctor said "Hie thee to yon hospital," and I replied "screw you, Doc. I'll die at home." (Did I ever mention I don't do hospital stays? Yeah. That's a story for my therapist.) I slept sitting up on my sofa so I could breath. I missed 4 days of work. And the clencher? I quit smoking. Ok, it was only for 2 weeks, but I did not have one cig for 2 weeks! Hey maybe that was another reason for being depressed and cranky. Earth to Stalker. Sheesh.

To top it off, all of the coughing finally loosened up everything within the uterus so I got to play female while being sick. NORma! See, I have PCOS. Sometimes I go for up to a year with no period. That means everything just keeps building in the uterus, so when I finally have one, it can last for up to 6 months straight and involve days of not being able to leave the house. Plus, for the first time in.....7 years? 8 maybe? There was cramping. Holy shit women do this every month??? No thank you. I'll take mine all at once with no pain, please.

Then there was dealing with half of the blogosphere being pregnant and I'm not, plus all of the pregnant people still being thinner than me. I've been obsessing about my weight lately. Normally I am a happy, little fat clam. Despite my obesity (that just needs to be in bold.) I am just really cute. Everyone says so. And I am. But I could lose 100 lbs and still be in the morbidly obese category. This is a scary thing. I'm relatively healthy as far as blood pressure, blood work stuff, heart rate....I'm just round. So that's had me kinda down as well. Not to worry. I am sooo over it.

Next post: a meme and why my expectations for humanity have been lowered. (Basically, I am gonna bitch about work).

Hope everyone has a great day!

Call off the dogs!!

Unassociated Press (UP)
Navasota, Texas
Wednesday, 10/19/2005


Stalker Angie, a.k.a The Stalker has been found after almost a month of missing from her online community. According to Miss Stalker, the last thing she remembers was "sumthin 'bout some big storm comin' round" and waking up in New England "somewhere." Eye witnesses claim to have seen Miss Stalker skulking about town until she saw what seemed to be a familiar face. Miss Stalker was found living in a pin oak in the backyard of one Norma Knitter. When asked about her unknown guest, Miss Norma stated, "That *&#$% is crazy. No normal person hides in someone's *@#$%^*@^% backyard! She's been staying so close to my pin oak that her body heat has kept the #^$@# thing from changing it's Autumn colors like it should. I hope they lock her creepy arse up for a while and make the internet safe again. I mean, really people. NORma!" When asked to comment on Miss Norma's statement, The Stalker just said, "She knits real purty like. Sometimes she hangs purty scarves in my tree for me to look at, too."

Miss Stalker turned herself in after hearing that Christina had finally gotten internet again and being poked and prodded by Miss Christina to update the blog. The following is her full statement:

Look, I got busy and lazy, ok? Plus I was so not in the right frame of mind to be in, like, contact with other humans. I've been depressed and cranky. Besides, I never really went away. I've just been hanging in the shadows. There has been blog reading going on, just no commenting. I now have so much to blog about there will be almost daily (like I could ever keep a schedule) updates for a while until I wind down or people beg me to shut the hell up. Plus there will be yarn porn galore, dead shrubbery porn and possiby some puppy porn pics.

Tomorrow, catching up on all of the personal business I have missed out on.

Hunker down

Well as much as I hate to disrupt my consistent blogging I've had going (stop laughing) I will post after hurricane Rita comes blowing through here and knocking all of my pecans off of my trees. Not to worry, we're on the west side of the storm and should now be just on the edge. We were originally going to be right smack dab in the path. On the plus side, if we lose electricity, I can knit. And who knows, maybe now I can join the pregnant knitting blogger club. Or maybe not. Hehe.

A Prize Indeed

So, you've been to the site, and you have made your donations. Of course you have. I have faith that you have gone and done just that. And why wouldn't you? There are people to be helped. Fellow countrymen and women. Fellow human beings. And as icing on the cake, there are goodies! I have done my donation, and will probably do so again. I have also donated some little pretties for the drawings. I know! How exciting! And what did the Stalker donate? None other than these little beauties. (Click for larger image of course)

These are a group of 8 stitch markers to go to a very lucky person. I say lucky because I am very proud of these. I want a set for myself and intend to do just that at some point. But there are a lot of beautiful things being donated. And did you see the freakin' total so far?? Almost $55,000 last time I looked. That is just....phenomenal. And here is a close-up of the blue markers and then the white ones.



On the health front, I did get to go to the hospital for the knee, and it is just really inflamed. I got a couple of shots in my ass and things are on the mend. Yay! My bowling career may be shot though. Cuz, you know, I go bowling soooo often. As in the last time was 5 years ago. Heh.

On the yarn front, I did add to the stash and I know you are just dying to see what I added. It will just have to wait. Yes, I am that evil. It gives you something to look forward to.

Hope everyone has a great day!!

Too out of shape for bowling??

How can you be too out of shape for bowling? I'm the same shape as the ball! Apparently, round is only good if you plan to roll down the lane. So I killed my right knee on Monday while bowling. It hurts to sit, stand, lay down......driving sucks. It was something medical and I have pain killers (wheeee!!!) for it so I need to get this down before this last batch kicks in. Or, maybe it's too late. Who knows? Who cares. I don't. Look at all the pretty colors.

So go visit Margene, please. She and Susan are heading up a drive for relief for the victims of Hurricane Katrina (hereforto or something like that known as the Windy Bitch). And no Norma, you can't claim Windy Bitch too! I'll give you DP, but this one I get to keep. :P Anywho, there will be a donation from yours truly as soon as I am clear headed enough not to donate my mortgage payment because I am drugged up and weepy. There will also be stitch markers made to donate as a prize for donations as soon as I can be trusted with beads and pliers. This whole Windy Bitch situation has me just stunned at the fury of nature, the goodness of human nature, the horror of human nature, and the ability of suck ass politicians to make a natural disaster into a political issue. Give me a fucking break people. There isn't a Republican or a Democrat out there that caused the storm. Shit happens. Quit pointing the finger, rally together and get those people some help. Ok, must calm down. My apologies for my little rant. Politicians just chap my ass.

Oh and no telling Margene I linked to her. I don't know if she even knows who I am and I don't think she's ever been here. I am silently stalking her. Shhhhhhhh. *Lurk lurk stalk stalk*

Hope everyone has a great ooh pretty colors!!

Update*

Sweet baby Jesus in my drugged up state I find I've been tagged. For a meme. And Skitter thinks I won't hit her. Hahahahahaha!! Ok, so I won't but I'll get her back. So here goes....

My 23rd post, 5th sentence reads:

I really don't have any excuses. (This cracks me up. I still don't have any excuses.)

Here are the rules for the meme:

1. Go into your archive.
2. Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.
5. Tag five people to do the same.

Ok, so I am tagging........Carma & Pinkerbell (2 in one blog. I am good.), Christina (even thought it will be some time for her to get back to me on that), The Bunny (hehe), and of course the Blog Mistress even though she will commence beating me about the head and shoulders with the cheapest acrylic yarn she can find. She loves me like that. Heee.

Pain

There will be a longer post about this tomorrow maybe, but I had a great weekend. I really did. I got to spend Sunday with my nephew, who is the coolest 12-year-old in the history of 12-year-olds. Yesterday I spent at a day long Sweet 16 birthday party type thing that involved all sorts of fun activities. I am 33 and so out of shape, I get winded putting on flip flops. I kept up with the girls. I am paying for it today. And will probably pay for it tomorrow. I never knew I had muscles there. I want them cut out now, please.

I'm not feeling up to posting more at this time. The whole Hurricane Katrina thing has me kinda down. It's just...horrible. I'm praying for those involved and for folks with loved ones in those areas. 'Nuff said.

Hope everyone has a great day!

It's All Lies

Ok, so about 2 months ago I made a conscious decision to drink more water. I have a Dr. Pepper (hereforeto or something like that know as DP) addiction and it's about time I did something about it. Now, I won't be cutting DP out of my life for good. That's just stupid. And it will never work. I LIKE DP. I enjoy drinking it. And if I try to quit drinking it entirely my mind will rebel. Simple. But if I allow myself to have one when I really, really want one, no biggie. In the last 2 months I have had all of 2 DP's. Seriously. Just the 2. So I'm doing ok, plus saving money. My problem was, I wasn't drinking a DP just when I wanted one. If I was thirsty, I just reached for one. Or kept one with me at all times. Rather scary stuff, dude.

So, enter water, stage left. Don't get me wrong, my dear stalkees, I'm not exclusive to water. I am a beverage whore and will spread my favor around. I like milk and juice in the morning, I drink about 2-3 cups of coffee a week now and the occasional tea at lunch. But I have this humongo cup at my desk and we have a free ice maker and water cooler. My humongo cup stays full and I drink about 4 of them a day just between the hours of 9am - 6 pm.. So here are some observations about all this damn water drinking.

1.) Why in the hell am I so damn thirsty all the time now? I drink more fluids than I ever did during my DP days, and yet I stay thirsty. Why??? Where is all the fluid going now? Is there some magical hydrating property in DP that I am missing out on?

2.) I am 33, purging my system of DP, drinking more than my share of water a day and my face is breaking out. Pardon me, but What. The. F*ck. I am not a 15-year-old on greasy french fries!!!!! Dammit!

3.) They say that drinking more water will help you lose weight. Lies. All of it. Lies. Drinking more water just makes you pee. A lot. A whole lot. What makes you lose weight is all the running to the bathroom. I used to go to the restroom once or twice on an average workday. Makes for a very productive individual. Now? Every hour. I look like a yo yo in my chair. Sit down, make a call, run to the bathroom. And it is a run. I'm one of those people who cannot casually go to the restroom. I think my bladder is broken in that it only registers as full at the very last possible moment. Then the race is on and by race I mean that fast little walk where your legs only move from the knees down in this rapid cartoonish fashion because to move any more leg would require a cleanup crew and a trip home to change.

4.) There are very few things I like in my water. Tea, coffee or kool aid just about covers it all. I don't want any kind of fruit in my water. Blech. I don't like it. Do I like lemonade? Oh you betcha. But not if I see, or have to participate in, the mutilation of lemons to get it. It pretty much has to be made before I ever see it. Besides, I can't make fresh lemonade because I am topically allergic to lemons. I can drink lemonade, eat lemon cakes, pies, cookies.....all day. If lemon juice gets on my skin I get tiny blisters that hurt. What is that all about?

So I am wondering if this water gig is all it's cracked up to be. What's your take on it?

In other news, our Norma Dear had a post about idiosyncrasies some time back. Which, of course, got me to thinking about if I had any. I have decided I am a complete weirdo.

I once, while in nursing school, got to help with an autopsy. I literally got to pull a man's brains out of his head. It was one of the most exciting moments of my life. I have seen a man on one table and his guts on another. I know what cancer smells like. Theses things I can handle. You show me an infected hangnail? I get woozy and nauseous. I also get the major heebie-jeebies and have to look away.

I cannot mix my food. And by that, I don't mean that my food cannot touch. I can handle that. But I have to eat my food, one item at a time. Let's say, for example, that I am having grilled chicken, rice, carrots, broccoli and a dinner roll. I will eat them in order. And just by imagining the plate I can tell you which order I will go in. Carrots first (all of them) then broccoli, rice, chicken then the roll. I cannot take a bite of carrots and then one of chicken, then maybe broccoli.....I just can't. I have to eat all of one item, then the next item. I even will turn my plate so that whatever item I am eating is right in front of me. This drives my mother insane.

I am a tactile person. I have to touch things to see how they feel. Certain things I can't stand because of how they feel. Flannel. Flannel is the best torture method known to man. You can hit me all day and you'll get nothing. Put me in a flannel nightgown between flannel sheets and I will be reduced to tears in an instant. I just....bleark. No flannel. I am the same way about food. I love love love the taste of coconut. I love the smell of coconut. I cannot eat coconut because the texture of it in my mouth drives me batty. Same thing with celery. I like celery. But I hate the way it feels in my mouth. Same way with Lima beans or Navy beans. Any of the real "meaty" beans. Ugh. And now that I have scared everyone away.....

Have a great day!!!

About Damn Time

*Ahem* Is this thing on? Oh. Umm hi, my name is Stalker Angie. You may not remember me, but this is my blog? Yeah. So ummm, how ya been? Good good. Yeah, not too bad myself, thanks for asking. Oh the dogs? Yeah, they're good. We still have Penny but she's at the top of the list for a new home. We're pretty happy with the decision at this point. We're just not right for her. She deserves more attention than we can give her.

Ermm.......Look! Stitchmarkers!

Yeah, they match my project bag. But I like blue and white together. I love the one with the row counter on it. I don't remember who's blog I got the idea from, so if it was you, holler out and let me know, k? No, I'm not gonna leave the tops like that. That was a temporary solution until I got some split rings of the right size. I have them now. These will be fixed. They work, and they don't snag yarn, but the tops aren't very pretty. A bit rustic for me.

Huh? Behind the markers? The bag? Oh! The project on needles! Duh. Silly me. That's gonna be a washcloth. I stole the idea from Christina, of course. She had asked me to finish her potholder for her, but she never sent it to me, so I just started this instead. I think it's coming along nicely.

I also have a square of.....uummm....well it's a square. Almost. It's not really blog worthy though, so we'll just move on.

Now a lot of people don't believe me when I say I'm short all over. I have proof! Sorta. Ummm...ok I have 2 pictures of my dinky feet that just shows how short and wide they are. They match the rest of me. Short and wide. Even my toes are short and wide. Oh, and the teeny tiny toenails? Those are grown out for getting summer pedicures. They are actually longer than I normally wear them.

That thick slab of meat above the ankle? Oh, my calf. Solid muscle baby. Can't say the same for the ol' thighs, but my calves are very muscular from...ummm..well, football. And weight lifting in highschool. My arms have always been weaker than hell, but my legs could move an elephant. Oh wait, they move me. Nevermind. Hehe Oh, and wanna know what's sad? That shot above is just below my knee. Not much else to my calf. Keep thinking dinky, people. And a final shot for anyone out there with a foot fetish. (That should get some good google hits, eh? Hehehehe)


Disclaimer: These photos were taken at my parents house. No way in hell would I have any-damn-thing Southwestern on my bed. *shudder* Besides, I don't even know where my ironing board IS, much less have it out and usable.

Hope everyone has a great day!

Sniffle

There's this.....weather......crap.......thing just hanging over the center of my state just dropping rain by the bucket load. Now, normally, I am not one to complain about such things because I love the sound of rain. But this batch of storms has got my allergies so wonky it's insane. I counted. Fifteen (15) sneezes in a row. I think I broke a rib this morning. Seriously. Hurts to breath and I hate being a human snot factory. Oops. Probably TMI there. Hehe.

Well, as much as I hate doing short posts, I'm going to go take allergy medicine and drool on my keyboard for a while

Hobe everyoned has a grade day. *snort*

Drained

Ok, so this weekend was emotionally draining. No, I am not going into it because it's ugly business that is on the way to being resolved and so there's no need to drag it all up again. On the plus side, the stash is organized. I still have to get it out of the car and into the house, but at least it is organized now. It's not nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

On the crafting front, since I wasn't supposed to be playing with yarn in any sort of knitterly or crocheting capacity (I am so weak, but I will post about that later) I did make stitch markers this weekend. I made 10 of them and they are so cute! I am just missing the rings so I just made rings with the end of the wire once my beads were on. I also made sure none of the wire ends could catch on yarn. There will be pictures. Once I get them out of the car. (Update: the yarn was taken to a friends house to sort through this weekend. The stitchmarkers were made at said friend's house and migrated to the car with the yarn. Thank you for making me clarify that, Libby. *giggle*)

Now, go say Happy Birthday to Christina. You know you want to.

Hope everyone has a great day!

The Stalker Goes on Strike

Yes, you read it correctly. I'm on yarn strike. There will be no knitting, crocheting, tatting (or half assed tatting, in my case), or cross stitching until I get control of the stash. I can't pick a project because I have so much yarn, I don't know what I have. And nothing, I mean NOTHING sounds appealing right now. All of a sudden knitting is scaring the shit out of me because I don't want to do another round and round purse (as much as I loved Sophie), nor am I ready for charts to do lace *shudder*. Socks are still out of the question because I looked at the instructions. I did. I admit it. Hell, I bought sock books! I looked at dpns for sock knitting and thought to myself, "Why do they want me to knit with toothpicks????" So not happening. Besides, it still looks like an ancient Chinese torture device. I want to do a Soleil for my mom and mother-in-law. I have the yarn for it. Got it from Elann. But even with the lovely Christina (Hiya!) giving the helpful suggestions, I look at this tiny ass chart and break into a sweat. Scarves? I live in Texas. Scarves are a dumbass thing to knit here. Even if I want a Slytherin scarf.

I have decided what I need to do is organize and get a handle on the stash. Now, this may not sound so bad, but I have seen some of y'alls stashes. They organize into cedar chests. Pffft. My front bedroom has 3 rolling things with 3 deep drawers each. Full of yarn. My front bedroom has bags upon bags and a couple of boxes. Full of yarn. There is yarn in my closet. Yarn in the backseat of my car (2 huge bags and 2 clear bins) that has yet to see the inside of my house. Yarn in the trunk of my car that has yet to see the inside of my house. My garage has this great little office in the back that is dedicated, at the moment, to 3 huge boxes of yarn that was my grandmothers that I got when she passed away last year. Then there are the books, pamphlets and magazines about yarn in some form or another every-damn-where. I honestly have more yarn than my LYS. And yet I keep buying yarn. I'm not a knitter. I'm not a crocheter. I'm a yarn whore.

Maybe I'm going about this whole knitting business the wrong way. I need to approach it like I did crochet. Knit an ass load (that's a whole bunch) of squares in coordinating colors, turn it into a sampler afghan, give the sum'bitch away to somebody and move on. That way I am learning the stitches, doing small projects and eating up the stash. But not until I get the stash under control. That starts this weekend. I am dragging all the yarn I can find into the living room and going through it. Period. Don't try to stop me. Christina, if you see me on GW this weekend(and you will *sigh*) , harp on me about my stash situation. Please.

So, since what I have is Guild Wars right now, I shall speak of it. And no, this is not turning into a GW blog. It's an everything blog, dammit. Read the top thingy, up there. The lovely, aforementioned Christina, also, as you are probably aware, plays Guild Wars. But she also knits socks, so she's my idol. She has also joined our guild and graced us with bringing over friends and folks from her previous guild, who have brought friends of theirs from another guild.. She has tripled our numbers. She has turned our quiet, little, unassuming guild into this raging chat machine of people grouping up for missions and guild battles. I have to turn off my guild chat and ignore my own guild sometimes to be able to complete missions. These people she brought to me and T are chatty, saucy, belligerent and have attitudes the size of a 7 year-old beauty pageant winner. And I love every single minute of it. DH and I have had more fun over the last week or so grouping with these fun folks and meeting new people. Thanks, Christina! She's probably turned all shades of red by now. hehe So, to further embarass her, I have screen shots of her and I in GW. This is her half naked ranger and my half naked warrior. Please, do not tell her she is hot. She knows. We all know. Everyone in the game tells her over and over and over and over and over and over.......oh, here's the pic. Click on it to get a larger view.


And the next 2 are of myself and T's female warrior (Don't ask. He likes to watch her run. o.O) and then one of my warrior doing a healing spell and striking one sexy pose.



And don't I wish I really looked like this.

Hope everyone has a great day!

Feelin the love

I just want to thank all you guys for all the well wishes (Welcome to the blog, Mira!). It looks like things may get better soon since T is headed to Colorado to visit his sister for a bit. When is he going? No idea. How long will he be there? Not a freakin clue. But that's not the point. Even if he just flies up there for the night, it's peace and quiet time for me. It's all about me, baby! ChristinA, (psst, Christina, the poking wasn't so bad. He doesn't poke hard. hehe) thank you for the words of wisdom on the Soleil. I'll have to pick it up and give it the ol' college try again. Is it considered a WIP or a UFO if all I did was cast on, get confused and shove it in a bag somewhere?

So we made a decision about the Demon Dog. There is a place in town called the Woodstock Animal Foundation of Texas and they do some wonderful work with animals that they adopt out. Yes, it is breaking our hearts to make this decision, but honestly, between work and the 3 other pooches, we just don't have time to get her the training she needs. And even if we did, or we made the time, this is a big dog. She weighs close to 60 lbs and we have her in a house that is under 1500 sq ft. It's just not fair to her. She needs a home with a huge ass backyard to play in and kids to romp with and throw toys for her. She was never supposed to be a permanent addition to the house, but we wanted to try because we adore her. But, we will be saying goodbye to her soon.

This will actually alleviate some of our stress because she likes to chew things. She has an insatiable curiosity that lands her in trouble all the time. She is either pulling things out of the trash, the dirty clothes, the kitchen sink, bathroom trash cans, off the dining room table......aarrrgggghhh! And it's not like she tears it up, she just wants to drag it around the house for a little while until she sees something else fun to tote around. And I really, really want it stopped before I come home one day to find my panties in the backyard for the whole neighborhood to see. Chain link fence, you see. Yeah. Not to mention that our backyard is right across from two (2) day care centers. With Children. Children find underpants funny. I will not be the neighborhood panty lady. It's bad enough when I'm on the phone with my mother-in-law and T yells (so she can hear, obviously) "Baby, you left your panties in the living room again." Yep. You know me. I'll strip anywhere. *sigh*

Hope everyone has a great day!

It's all about peer pressure.

Ok, so I get the hint. I'm getting the pressure about not updating again, and it's not even from someone with a yarn addiction! Ms. TMK herself has applied the thumbscrews with full backing from the Blog Mistress. Then last night I am innocently watching TV because I need a small break from GW and my hubby walks up and pokes me in the shoulder. Twice. Then proceeds to tell me that it's from my GW/knitting/blogging buddy, Christine,(Update #2: It's Christina you twit. ChristinA. If my head weren't attached....) because I need to update. Has she updated recently? No, I don't think so. Granted, her last post was 2 days after my last post so she now has 2 days to update before the poking begins in earnest. Ya hear that? There. Will. Be. Poking! (Update: Christina has felt the force and has narrowly escaped the Poking Finger of Doom by updating as I was writing. I'll get you, my pretty. And your little half nekkid Ranger, too!)

I do have a good reason for ignoring the blog, and no, it's not the game. Ok, it's not only the game. The game is just my way of escaping and hiding from the men in my life. It's been an absolute shit storm of stress at Chez Stalker here lately. My dear darling hubby, love of my life, has Multiple Sclerosis. Now he was diagnosed a few years back so don't go thinking this is a recent development. It's still stressful. And his medication causes mood swings. Not fun, I tell ya. Imagine, if you will, a menopausal woman who has simultaneously quit smoking, quit drinking and has decided that her crack addiction has to go at the same time. Multiply that by about 20. That's what I live with. His doctor has given him 6 weeks off from work to deal with some stress issues to keep from having a relapse because my hubby's new supervisor is a dick. I would be nicer about it, but I don't like the man. He gives me the creepies.

Now, while I am happy that T is being taken care of, I still have to deal with angry hubby, people at work asking me all sorts of questions (we work at the same business), sad hubby, dirty house, green-eyed monster cuz I have to go to work and hubby gets to stay home, blah blah blah. I need a break. Enter weekend at the parents house. I am a Daddy's Girl through and through. I once broke my brother's nose because he said something ugly about my dad. I didn't mean to break it. I did mean to punch him though. So off I go to be a princess and not have to deal with anything. When I get there, Mom is still at work so I get a few hours with Dad. Cool!

Me: Hi Daddy! How ya been?
Dad: Oh feeling better now.
Me: Better?
Dad: Well yeah, I just got out of the hospital. They think I may have had a heart attack. They said they may do that balloon thingy in my arteries or something. That or open heart surgery. Have you had dinner yet?
Me: Guh.....

Now folks, I should be used to this. I'm the youngest of 3 and the only girl. My family keeps everything from me because I just don't need to worry myself over it. Grrrrr. So I pumped my dad for information once we got inside and found out he had an appointment for Monday morning and made him promise to call me and give an update. He's fine by the way. The doctor found very little blockage and gave him some meds. Extra white hairs anyone? Then as Daddy and I are talking, I realize it's too quiet in the house. My parents have a bird and a big, fluffy Husky dog. They have had these 2 since I was in high school.

Me: Daddy, where's Snowball (the dog)?
Dad: Oh he died, honey.
Me: What happened???
Dad: Oh the vet says he had a stroke and he was bad off so we had to put him to sleep so he wouldn't suffer.
Me: When did this all happen?
Dad: Must have been 2 weeks ago now. It was about a week after Elliot (the bird) died.
Me: Do you people know how to use a freakin' phone??

Thankfully (or so I thought) Mom got home soon after so I could pump her for information on my dad's health.

Me: So when exactly did Daddy go into the hospital.
Mom: Well, I guess it was Thursday, cuz it was the day after your Grandpa went into the hospital and he went in Wednesday.
Me: Guh.......

I gave up. Luckily on the way out of my house on Saturday I checked the mail and one of my packages was this:

I hid in my parent's guest room on Sunday and read the entire thing. It was almost like getting to be an angsty teen again.

On The Yarn Front:

Not much. Nothing really. I have a shawl started but I'm just not feeling it. I also have a tank for my mother-in-law started but I'm confused by the graph. Just the first line. It's the Soleil tank from Knitty. That first line is just knit. Here's my question. On the first round, does my cast on count as the first line of the graph and I skip that first knit round?? Or do I cast on and knit a row per the graph? Help! I'm gonna go crochet an ugly doily or something. Guh....

There are no lemons here.

Short post today, my dear Stalkees.

Sometimes life just goes ahead and hands you the damn lemonade without all the muss and fuss and it quenches a thirst you never knew you had. Sometimes, things just happen and you're not sure how or why, you're just, I don't know....Relieved? Excited? Content? Blown away? I feel this way every time I see this. This is the final numbers for The Dulaan Project. We were shooting for 500 items. Go have a look. Accept the warm fuzzies that come with realizing what was accomplished and then go hit your stash and go ahead and start a hat or a scarf for next year. Make a sampler scarf out of squares to improve your stitches. Let's see what we can get done for next year, shall we?

Hope everyone has a great day!

The proof is in the pudding.

Warning my dear Stalkees, this is a picture heavy post. Click pics for bigger views.

Have you been to See the latest figures for Dulaan? No?? Then run over here and check it out. I'll wait. Go on.

Impressive ain't it? And mine is just getting into the mail. I'm going to overnight it so it makes it on time. Yeah, I procrastinate but you know this about me so just get over it. And I have pictures! Hooray! First off is a shot of the 3 fleece blankets going.




I'm a bit pissed about this because there was supposed to be 4. Somewhere in the last 5 months I have lost an entire fleece blanket. If you saw my house this would not surprise you. It sure as hell doesn't surprise me. On the plus side, I'll find it in 3 days and it will just become the first piece for next year. Stubborn ass blanket.

Next is a picture of the entire pile that is headed for Arizona, then to Mongolia.



In the group we have 9 hats, 3 blankets (dammit), 2 scarves, a fleece coat and 3 pairs of mittens. So 18 items in all. Not too shabby. (Under the table is my Lhasa Apso, Alex. He's not going. He's momma's boy so he has to stay with me.) And no, I didn't make it all myself but that's not the point, is it. But I did make some of it and I have pics of each. Hooray!

Here we have a Ken Hat a la Harlot and a matching scarf. I used 3 strands of yarn in 3 shades of green. I loved how the colors turned out.



This was my first ever knit hat and it was fun to do. I didn't have any DPNs in the house so I improvised by using straight needles and just moving the stitches back and forth. It worked, don't knock it. Next is the Pinwheel/Butthole Hat by Norma Dear made using a strand of pastel variegated and a strand of light purple. It's all shimmery. Oooh.....aaaaah.



Then, having made said Butthole, I of course had to make the Half-assed Hat and I used the 3 shades of green from the Ken Hat and a strand of the light purple from the Pinwheel/Butthole Hat and, well, the picture kinda explains what I did. This was fun because it was my first ever color change in knitting and it prepared me for Sophie. I really like how this one turned out.



And here it is folks. All 17 (Update: 18. There were 18 items, you twit. Not 17. Stop it!) items minus one Lhasa Apso all wrapped up and heading for loving homes across the big pond.



That's a wrap!

This isn't a house....

Oh well thank the powers that be, it's still June. I would hate to have only one post for the whole month. And I'm not the only one. I've noticed on a lot of the blogs (well, Except Norma's. Norma Dear posts like clockwork. Dammit, Norma.) that it seems like eveyone is a bit behind. It just seems that June has been a too much to handle for most of us. If this damn month would end we could get on with our blogging lives and do things in a timely manner. There have been moves, medical crisis's....crisees....crisisses...uummm....medical issues to deal with, families to deal with, online gaming to deal with and animals to deal with, which brings me to the title. (Neat how I came back to that, eh? Eh?)

I don't live in a house. I live in a wildlife refuge with decent mortgage payments. I came to that conclusion this weekend. I know. I can hear it now. "Why, Dear Stalker, how ever did you come to this conclusion?" Well, I shall tell you, shan't I. It's why we're here, after all. My adult life started off with one dog. One adorable half Shih Tzu, half Lhasa Apso named Shu Shu. And she is, by the way, very, very Shu Shu. A total priss of a pooch. So unlike me it is unreal. When Shu Shu was 8 years old, her life took a humongous turn for the weird and she ended up with a new daddy and a new home cuz mommy had to go and get married. When T and I married, we decided to celebrate our union by getting a puppy. Yes, most people buy new furniture or have babies, but we are so not most people. Enter into the picture, Alex.

Alex is a full blood, AKC registered, papered and all, Lhasa Apso. We now have an apartment with 2 people, 2 dogs. All is right with the world. Sorta. Shu Shu hated Alex. Alex was all young male and all dog. Shu Shu did not care for either of the two and a combination was almost more than she could stand. She spent most of her time hiding from him. And that was ok by us because we weren't sure what to make of Alex at first. Alex was the only male of his litter (we bought from a well known Lhasa breeder. We don't do puppy mills or pet stores) and when we got to the breeder's house, he was nowhere to be seen because he was at the very bottom of a female pile. They didn't pick on him, he just didn't care. No, really. So, we got him out of his pen and he followed us all around the yard. Too cute. Home he goes.

We get him home and I am sitting on the couch playing with him, then I go to set him down. Well, when I set him down on his haunches, I was expecting a normal puppy thing of falling forward and running off. Alex sat there for a moment, folded in half and fell on his side. "Oh shit, we bought a defective dog! It's that or I broke him! Honey come quick!!" Thank goodness I was wrong. He's just that laid back folks. My mother calls him soup in a dog bag. If you pick him up he goes completely limp and every bone turns to Jello. It's a bit disconcerting at first, but you get used to it. He's very cuddly. You just have to watch him or he'll slide right out of your lap and land on the floor with a resounding 'thud'. He's so trusting. Gives me the heebie-jeebies some times.

Fast forward to six months later. Shu Shu goes into heat for the first time in 2 years, Alex all of a sudden isn't so...uummm...not gonna go there. Seriously. Let's just move on. At 9 years old, Shu Shu gives birth to her first litter of puppies. 4 puppies. 4 of the cutest little things that Shu Shu wants nothing to do with. She was a birthing pro! She never whined. Never whimpered. Never even groaned. She just pushed when necessary. And then ignored them. Hubby and I had to take them out of their birth sacks and clean them up. Hubby and I had to hold Ms. Priss down so they could eat. Hubby and I decided that we were keeping the first born. Enter Saoirse, stage left.

Saoirse is Gaelic for freedom and that is so her personality. Saoirse is pronounced "seer'-shah". You're welcome. Saoirse is the cutie pie in my first post. Feel free to "ooh" and "ahh" cuz we still do. Now we have 2 people and 3 dogs in a slightly bigger apartment. Things aren't so bad. Then we decide 2 years ago that we really need a house. Ok, I decide we really need a house, Hubby decides I've lost my mind. We get a house. Now, I've looked at real estate up North and you people are outta your damn minds. My house could easily sell for close to $200,000 up there. That's crazy! Granted, we got our house really cheap for down here too, but jeez people come on. We have a 2 bedroom, 1½ bath, 1472 sq ft., one car garage and a car port. All of the rooms are large because there are only 5 real rooms in the house. The computer room is just big enough for 2 desks and the bathrooms don't need to be big. This house cost us all of $55,000. Oh pick your jaw up. Our mortgage payments are $535 a month and that includes insurance and taxes. Anyone wanna move closer to Ye olde Stalker now? Huh? Huh?? Like I said, not bad for a wildlife preserve. Enter Penny.

Penny has been posted about. You guys all know the story. 2 people, 4 dogs. We'll move on. Enter the mouse. Yes. I have a mouse. Just one that I can tell and he's a brave little bastard. Here I am, sitting at my computer, playing Guild Wars, of course, and the bastard runs across my hand. Across my hand!! I did what any self respecting person would do. I freaked. I told T that this little nasty critter had run across my hand and his response? "It's ok honey, we're in the middle of a mission here." Yeah, I'll give you a moment to read that again. He's lucky his mission isn't to find a new place to sleep. Now this mouse has run across my hand 4 times now. And at one point he peeked out between the desk and the laptop and I yelped. The mouse squeaked. Behind me I hear "Aww baby you scared him!" Who's house is this anyway?

So Saturday I'm firing up the grill to cook me and hubby some very yummy vittles. Everything is oh so tasty from a grill. I reach for the lighter fluid and get attacked. No, I don't know what attacked me but behind the lighter fluid and the lantern out there is a nest. With 2 little spotted eggs in it. There are birds breeding in my laundry room. I give up. I'm moving into the backyard.

Remember me?

Yeah it's been a week. There were barbecues to attend and the world's most lethal bbq baked beans to make and devour and soooo much brisket and potato salad and oh sweet deity the desserts. Anyone else hungry now?

So nothing has been going on. No, seriously. I have allowed myself to become immersed in Guild Wars this week. Not that it wasn't bad before, mind you. I have been playing this game since last October but it was in beta testing and could only be played one weekend a month. Now it's live and it's sucking up every free moment I have. Granted, this game went live in April and it was pretty consuming then. Of course, most of you are sitting out there not really giving a two bit shit about Guild Wars except maybe my new friend Lee Ann (Welcome to the blog, Ms. Hotwheels!) who is getting sucked into World of Warcrap...errmmm...Warcraft. (It's a friendly poke. Calm down. Tell Spiff it's ok.) She'd understand how consuming it is because I think, like me, she has lost her DH to it. It's rather difficult to work yarn while spellcasting and healing and making sure that next group of monsters isn't sneaking up on you. Not to mention trying to keep an eye on chat and deciphering all the leet speak. For those of you not conversant in leet, it looks a little something like this:

Player1: OMG WTF u n00b! u suxx0rz. u m@d3 m3 di3z!
Player2: OMG LOL u g0t pwned. that b0ss pwnz u
Player1: STFU n00b. my s\/\/0rdz > you O_o
Player2:LOL GG Cry

Which translates roughly into:

Player1: Your inexperience has caused my character to pass away.
Player2: Wow, I can't believe that high level character killed you so quickly.
Player1: I don't appreciate you implying that I am not a good player. I should take my high level sword and kill you.
Player2: Oh you are too funny. That would end the game and make me sad.

Yeah, it's pretty hard to find players who can string together a coherent sentence. Sadly enough, you get used to it. It actually cracks me up most of the time.

In yarn news, I have nothing, I repeat NOTHING, on either hook or needle. I have boxes of yarn sitting in there neglected. I am at a serious project block. I have no WIPs, no UFOs, and nothing in mind. I need an intervention!! I don't make sweaters cuz ummm....well it would just take too much yarn. I really should be making more stuff for the Dulaan project, but I have so much stuff to find boxes for now it's insane.

I was trying to use my leftover Cascade 220 from Sophie to make a small argyle pillow. I suck ass at argyle. It's loose and frumpy and not at all appealing. I have no idea how to hold 3 strands of yarn to get it done. I can knit and purl, people. So, I am taking drastic measures. I am going to teach my self some serious knitting just like I did crochet. A Sampler Afghan. *Dun dun duuuuuuun* I got myself a stitch a day calendar thingy that I saw on someone's blog (I don't remember where, but you know who you are and this is all your fault.) and I'm gonna start making squares, I think. No, I am not gonna make 365 freakin squares. Although, they might become dishclothes for friends and family because I may not wanna join all those damn squares. You know the reasoning behind that. Don't make me go there. But I did the same thing to learn crochet. I made all these different granny squares using the same 3 colors and it made the most beautiful afghan. It went to my MIL. I really need to get a picture of it and post it. The edging is gorgeous. You'd like it, I promise.

So, am I in a rut or what? What's the solution people? The first one who says socks gets banned, I swear. Should I work on my technique and make squares for afghan, future gifts? Should I take my lazy ass to my LYS and get the silk I was talking about and make a shawl? Should I cast on the mohair/wool blend my MIL gave me and learn lace? (Yeah, she rocks. I'll give you a pic of it later.) Suggestions welcome, the threat still stands. :)

Hope everyone has a good day!

And now, for your viewing pleasure, I present......

Yep. I did it. I made a Sophie. Wait, that sounds too close to "I made a doodie!" So, I knit up a Sophie bag. My mind is way too twisted to post anything seriously today. Everything I type just sounds so....dirty in my head. But we shall forge ahead (snickersnort) my little stalkees.

I'm rather proud of my Sophie for several reasons. It's my first knitting project on my Denise circulars. It's the first time I've had to pick up stitches in knitting. It's my first finished project made with wool yarn. It's the first time I've done serious color changes where a mistake would be oh-so-visible and it was my first time felting, ever. So see? It was a milestone project. I'm still not seeing fair isle or socks in my future. It's just not gonna happen. Sock knitting looks like a Chinese torture device while it's in progress. And I don't have to worry about any of you trying to ensnare me into knitting socks because none of you know my address to send me hand knit socks and suck me in. HAH! I'm safe. Besides, who would I knit socks for?? My feet are square. They are as wide as they are long and it would take too much pattern changing to make a pair. There's not a chance in hell that I will knit socks for the hubby. He wears a size 17 shoe. It would take 3 skeins of yarn to make one pair. Not happening.

Knitting Sophie up wasn't so bad. It gave me a better grasp of decreasing and it went really quick. I knit all of the heather green section and 2 rows of the amethyst in about 4 hours of Songburst. Rather quick for me. I also discovered that to get from my house to work with T driving, is one cigarette and a row of Sophie away. Now, felting the bag was nerve wracking. It took everything I had not to call information for the number of a certain Blog Mistress and say "Hi this is Stalker Angie and I am felting Sophie and will you hold my hand please???" So Sophie went into the washer with hot water and a pair of jeans. And there was some hovering involved. I didn't leave the washer throughout the entire process. Each time I would pull it out and think "Is it enough? How small should it be? Is it supposed to look like an amoeba on crack??" After only 4 cycles in the washing machine, Sophie was felted. Then she was blocked and dried which took another 24 hours. T did the grommets because I was sucking ass at grommetting (is that a word?) and couldn't get the little buggers to stay together. So without further ado...here she is. Ms. Sophie v1.0. Click on picture for bigger view as usual.


Do the Sophie! Do dodo dodo dodo do dooo....

She was knit with double strands of Cascade 220, on size 10 Denise circulars. The handles are from Kim, of course, over at Gibson Girl Designs. She does beautiful work over there. Sophie was presented to my MIL for Mother's Day and she was well received. I know there's another Sophie Bag in my future because I want to make one for T's sister for Christmas. Right now I'm in a rut with no project started. I have yarn block or something. I have the yarn and the needles. I guess I just need the right project and no, it won't be socks. What I think I want to do is make a shawl. One of the kind you can wrap around your shoulders or tie around the waist that looks more like netting than anything else. And I want it fringed for that cute swing. And it has to be knit (Stop laughing at me, Ms. Ryan) because the yarn will NOT lend itself to crochet. I have tried. Anyone know of a pattern I can use? I just want something very open. *Sigh* I'll find what I want at some point.

Hope everyone has a great day!!

Big floppy hats and teeny tiny pastries

First off I want to welcome a couple of Dorks to the blog and some lovely people who found me through said Dorks. Oh, and any other new readers I may be missing. Hi Ladies!!

So the day before Mother's Day, the Historical Society of Millican, Texas had itself a Tea. The Country Gingham Tea to be exact. I was a smidge nervous about going because I didn't have anyone to go WITH and the only person I knew that would be there is my mother-in-love, but she was serving, not socializing. Have I mentioned I have issues about going places alone the first time? I do. I can go out to eat alone, go to the movies alone, drive across states alone...but you get me to go into a library, new store or a meeting place all by myself? No sir, I don't like it. This would be why I haven't been to our local knitting guild meetings even though I know when and where it is. Can someone come hold my hand??

So anyway, about this tea. It was a grand time. It was a hoot and I had a great time. I don't even know where to start, so I guess I'll go from the beginning. I arrive to the Millican Civic Center/Meetin' House. This is the same place the hubby and I vote and it's an old civil war building that is in need of repair. Well, they did some repair. It was too cute. They had planted all around the front ramp and had hanging plants eveywhere. Oh wait! I have a picture! I have no idea who the ladies are, but they were nice and I love the dress.



Well when I got inside, they had patched up the old paneling as much as possible but the walls were covered in hand sewn quilts. All of the tables had white table clothes with gingham ribbon and big ribbon bows in all different colors. Sooooo pretty. Everyone is in pretty dresses and big hats to match. Hell, I even painted my toenails! Then we had a speaker who is a history buff and told us all about how that hall had been the meeting place for all of the counties on this side of the river to be shipped off to fight in the Civil War. It was interesting. Not my thing, but interesting. Then we got tea and food. Mmmmmm boy did we get good stuff. And yippee! I got to be served by T's mom! So the first course I have a picture of. They did everything so nice.


Almost too pretty to eat....almost.

We had chicken salad sandwiches, apple slices, an asparagus roll and an open face cucumber sandwich. Now folks, I don't like asparagus. I'm not real damn crazy about cucumbers either. It was all wonderful. I loved everything they served.

The next course (sounds so distinguished, don't it) was a cranberry/orange scone with honey butter. Are you drooling yet? Cuz then there was a third plate. Oh hell yeah. Bring on the sweets!


It's Texas. Pecans will be involved.

That's 2 luscious chocolate covered strawberries, a sugar cookie shaped like a tea pot (too cute!!), a Ghirardelli Caramel and a wonderful, wonderful, mouth watering pecan tart thingy. Oh it was divine.

But alas, I am an idiot. I didn't take any knitting. Not a bit. No crochet either. Stupid me thought it would be inappropriate. Sitting next to me during all of this lovely experience, was a good friend of the M-I-L. I had my camera with me for blogging purposes (see? I was thinking of you) so I showed her stored images of the Sophie bag (discreetly since my MIL was, like, there) and she just went nuts over it. So of course the nice lady across the table wanted to know what the fuss was about so I handed her the camera and she loved the bag and then fessed up that she knits as well. So the lady 2 seats down from her says "Are y'all talkin' about knittin'?" and we said we were and the next thing you know, we're having us a great big conversation about knitting. And I started it. Ms Ryan is probably laughing her ass off right now at the irony of it all.

But every woman at that table either knit, crocheted or both. And then I mentioned the LYS and there was a moment of complete silence and then my table sounded like the trading floor of the stock market. I tell you one thing though. Next time, I'm taking my current project. Screw decorum. By the end of our conversation, I had 2 ladies who would have helped me with an idea I have for knitting and had a couple of ladies that wanted me to show them some crochet stitches. Dumb ass stalker.

Tomorrow or Thursday you will see Sophie. Isn't it exciting??

Hope everyone has a great day!!